Just Keep Breathing
by iwannagibbs
Summary: Gibbs is taken by a man bent on revenge.  Will he get back to Ziva in one piece? Will he and their relationship sruvive?  Gibbs and Ziva established relationship.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I was in the middle of writing a light, happy AU JIBBS when this much darker story popped into my head. It's been a while since I posted anything so I hope a few of you enjoy this. It's all written so I'll be posting quickly. As always, reviews are welcomed.

Just Keep Breathing

Jethro Gibbs was tired. He hadn't been home in three days and he had barely been able to drive home without falling asleep at the wheel. He was looking forward to a couple of shots of bourbon, a hot shower and twelve hours of sleep. He pulled into his driveway and noticed he was the first one home. He wondered where Ziva was; she had left the Navy Yard twenty minutes before he did.

As he stepped out of his car, Gibbs sensed someone behind him but before he could turn around the butt of a gun slammed into the back of his head and he was knocked out cold. He didn't know it but a black cloth bag was pulled over his head, his hands cuffed behind him and he was quickly pushed into the trunk of his car. Then one of his attackers drove his car away while another man returned to the car they had come in and followed. Gibbs did not regain consciousness during the short trip to a secluded area near Alexandria, Virginia.

The two men pulled to a stop at the pre-arranged spot and a third man met them in a nondescript, dark blue van. This was the man in charge and the two kidnappers were careful to treat him with a certain degree of deference.

"Any problem?"

"None."

"No one around?"

"No one."

"Alright, put him in the van and get the car ready. We move from here in five minutes."

The leader watched as his minions roughly slung Gibbs' body into the van through the side door. He climbed in after the body and after making sure Gibbs was still out, ripped the bag off his head. Then he covered Gibbs' eyes with gauze patches which he taped securely. He the wound more tape around Gibbs' head making sure there was no way he could see or maneuver the tape off. As an added precaution against his prisoner waking, he gave him a shot of a quick acting sedative designed to keep him quiet for one to two hours. That was all the time he needed to get Gibbs where he wanted him. He spared a brief thought to the effects the shot would have if Gibbs had been hit too hard on the head but he wasn't too worried. After all, if the man died it wouldn't be that bad. A misfortune to be sure but nothing the man would lose sleep over. Finally, he secured Gibbs' body between two rolls of carpet and covered it with a tarp.

He stepped out of the van and handed each of the kidnappers an envelope containing $5,000 in small bills. He knew he could trust them to complete their assignment and never be seen in this area again. They were professionals and had come highly recommended. Their future employment opportunities would depend on their discretion in this job. They knew nothing of the rest of his plan and did not know his name. The face they had seen would be removed as soon as he was in the van and they were gone. Still he felt compelled to issue his standard warning.

"Make sure the device goes off no more than five minutes after we leave. There can be no mistakes and no one can identify this car. You must disappear. If I hear of you being seen in this area after tonight I will have you killed. Understood?"

Both been said they understood. They had no intention of sticking around. They had plenty of money to go back to Miami where it was sunny and warm. The first man assured him the charge had been set for the appropriate amount of time and there would be nothing left of the car but very small pieces. The second man was standing by to erase their car tracks after the van and the other car were back on the pavement. Once that was done to his satisfaction the leader raised his hand in farewell and drove off into the night with his cargo secured in the back of the van.

As he drove he peeled off his mask and tossed it out the window onto the highway in small pieces. He had a little over an hour drive, depending on the traffic of course, and settled down thinking again about what he was going to do to Special Agent Jethro Gibbs for the next two weeks. These next fourteen days were going to be the culmination of years of planning and hatred and the overwhelming urge to inflict pain and suffering on the man he held responsible for so much misery in his own life. Yes, the next two weeks were going to be wonderful; not for Gibbs of course, but he didn't think about that.

In the back of the van, Gibbs was barely beginning to regain consciousness as the road became rougher and finally the van came to a stop. He tried to move but found he couldn't. He was too woozy and his head was pounding. He had no idea what had happened. The last thing he remembered was leaving the Navy Yard to go home. After that everything was a blank. For a few moments he thought he was blind until he realized his eyes were taped shut. He throat was dry and his shoulders were killing him due to his hands being cuffed behind his back. He heard voices and the doors opening on the van. He remained very still not giving any indication he was awake.

"Get him inside and put him in the room at the end. No need to be gentle."

Gibbs felt a pair of big hands grab him by the front of his shirt and yank him out of the van. He barely got his feet under him when another man grabbed his left arm and yanked him up some steps and into a cabin or house or something. Gibbs had no idea where they were but he could smell pine and figured they were in a forest somewhere. There were no sounds of civilization and of course he couldn't see any light at all. He was barely walking; the two men were actually dragging him down the hall. The men hustled him down a hallway and shoved him into a small room. One of them let go of his arm and the other one guided him to a bed and told him to sit down. Gibbs didn't have much choice in the matter as the man pushed him down with one hand on his chest.

Gibbs managed to scoot back on the bed and found the wall to lean against. He desperately wanted to get his hands uncuffed. He heard door open and sensed someone enter the room. He heard a chair scraping on the wood floor and felt the person sitting close to him. And he desperately wanted to know what the hell was going on. After just a few moments he got some answers. He reminded himself later to be careful what he wished for.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Two

"Agent Gibbs I am going to answer some of the questions I'm sure you have floating around in your head. You do not know me but you may call me Mr. Smith if you need to assign me a name. No one knows where you are and your famous team will not find you. You will be with us for anywhere from ten days to two weeks depending on how much of our special brand of hospitality you can endure. I have no intention of killing you so rest assured you will be returned home when we are finished. Having said that and put your mind to rest for a moment let me also say you will at some point in the next ten days wish with all your soul that I would kill you. I will not. I will however inflict as much physical and mental pain and suffering on you as I can without giving you that final peace you will so desperately want.

I know you will resist and that is fine. You are but one man and I have several who are ready, willing and able to cause you considerable discomfort. Your eyes will remain covered for the entirety of your stay here. Not because you would be able to identify me because you wouldn't, but because it will add to your sense of disorientation and eventually fear. I will uncuff your hands but if you attempt to remove your eye coverings I will not only put them back on I will break your right arm first. Do you understand?"

Gibbs did not respond.

Mr. Smith nodded to a man standing in the doorway. He jerked Gibbs up by the shirt and hit him twice in the upper abdomen driving all the air out of his lungs. When the man let go of him, Gibbs fell helplessly to the floor.

"When I ask you a question I suggest you respond. Do you understand about the cuffs?"

"Yes," Gibbs gasped.

"Good. You are not here to be questioned about any deep dark national secrets. You are not being held for ransom. No one is being contacted to trade you for some poor political prisoner somewhere. You are here merely to be beaten and abused and made to suffer to within minutes of your own death. Then you will be taken home."

You are probably asking yourself why I'm doing this. If I'm so terribly angry with you that I would go to all this trouble why don't I just kill you? I'll tell you why; because I want you to remember this experience and know that I'm still out there somewhere. I can do this again anytime I want to. I can get you anytime. Or maybe someone you love. Now, that's enough for tonight. Try to get some sleep. The real fun begins soon."

The man who had hit him, picked Gibbs up and braced him against the wall face first. He removed the cuffs and Gibbs almost cried at the relief he felt at being able to move his arms and shoulders. The relief didn't last long. The man punched him twice in the kidneys and when Gibbs slumped to the ground the man kicked him in the chest and stomach so many times Gibbs lost count. Just before he passed out, Gibbs felt the man rip off his shirt, tee shirt and pants. Then he took his shoes and socks leaving him in just his boxers. The man helped him up then pushed him down on the bed.

"Toilet's on the wall to your right. Have a pleasant night."

Then the man left and Jethro curled up in the fetal position and tried not to move. He tried to think but his mind was so fuzzy he couldn't put two thoughts together. Maybe some sleep would help he thought. He drifted off finally in a haze of pain and confusion.

He had no idea how long he had been asleep but he was awakened by an overwhelming urge to pee. He sat up on the side of the bed and tried to remember what the goon had said about the toilet. To the right he thought. He stood up carefully and with his hands out in front of him shuffled to his right, found the wall and eventually the toilet. He hoped his aim was good but really didn't care. He heard himself hitting the water so he guessed he could at least still do that alright. Gibbs felt around a little more and found a sink. He turned on the water and found only cold. Better than nothing. He splashed some water on his face careful to avoid his eyes lest Mr. Smith think he was messing with the tape there. He swallowed a couple of handfuls of water and made his way back to the bed.

Gibbs laid down on the bare mattress and felt around for a blanket or sheet. There was none. Oh well. He stretched out and tried to calm his mind so he could think. He wanted to think about Ziva but he knew that wouldn't really help him. It might make him feel better for a while but not really. Instead, he thought about Mr. Smith. He didn't recognize the voice; it was flat and had no accent at all. For some reason this man wanted to hurt him and hurt him badly. After a while, Jethro knew he wouldn't figure anything out tonight. Despite what the man said, Jethro knew Ziva would be looking for him and she would get the team involved. They would find him. He just had to hold on. He was tough and figured he could withstand at least a few days of beatings. The man wanted him alive so Gibbs decided he would take the beatings and try to figure out who the guy was as they went along.

While Jethro was sleeping fitfully on the bare mattress, Ziva was pacing the floor of their living room trying to decide what to do. For the hundredth time she read the note she had found on the kitchen table when she arrived home earlier that night. The note read:

**I have agent Gibbs. If you look for him he dies. If you notify your father he dies. Tell ANYONE and he dies. Leave it alone and he will be back in two weeks. He won't be "good as new" but he will be alive. Don't fuck with me or he dies. You will be kept apprised of his condition. You can't help him but you CAN make it worse.**

Ziva had no idea what to do. Of course her instinct was to call Tony and tell him what was going on but she was afraid to do that. They, whoever they were, had been in the house. The note was left right there on the kitchen table where she and Jethro always left notes for one another. She considered contacting her father through the embassy but again, she was afraid to. They knew who she was and more importantly who her father was. She couldn't just do nothing.

She sat down at the kitchen table and did the only thing she could think of at the moment. She prayed. And she thought. Something was tickling the back of her mind but she couldn't quite pull it out. She was exhausted but how could she sleep? Her husband, the man she loved beyond reason was gone, taken by strangers and undoubtedly being hurt. She HAD to do SOMETHING!

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Three

Then it hit her. The yard light. Two weekends ago she had come home to find Jethro replacing their perfectly good yard light with a new one. When she asked him about it he said he just wanted a new one. She didn't believe him but decided to let it go until she could "interrogate" him her own way. That night while they were in bed she asked him about it again. He said he just decided he wanted a new one, it looked nicer and gave off better light. Then she began her 'persuasion'. It wasn't that she did anything to him to make him talk; it was more that she stopped doing what she had been doing and refused to start again unless he told her the truth. He was really in no "position" so to speak to argue at that point. When he promised to tell her the truth if she would continue she gladly did. Later he came clean with her.

"I've noticed some strange cars in the neighborhood lately and the new yard light has a camera in it. McGee found it for me. It's some wireless do-dad that records on a disc that's set up on the shelf in the dining room."

"What do you mean strange cars? What kind of cars?"

"Just different cars than are normally in the neighborhood. A couple of times there has been a gray sedan parked in front of the Martin's house and I know it doesn't belong to anyone around here. I've seen a couple of vans in the area. I'm just being cautious."

"Because of me? Or is there something else going on?"

"Partly because of you. Maybe it's your father watching us or maybe your father's enemies. I don't know. Maybe it's someone casing the neighborhood to rob houses when people are gone. So, if we get robbed or if anything happens, check the recording. Tim can show you how to do it."

"Why are you acting like I'll be the one in charge of this? Won't you be here to do it?"

"Of course I'll be here. I'm just saying that's what we'll do. Could we change the subject back to where we were before, please?"

"Where were we?" Ziva was laughing now and when she suddenly found herself pinned beneath her husband she couldn't laugh anymore because his mouth was covering hers.

That whole conversation ran through her head in mere moments and by the time it was over she was in the dining room getting the recorder off the shelf. She removed the disc and put it in her laptop. She watched the last few hours first and saw two men approach the driveway just after Jethro got home and then only one of them returned to the car. Then Jethro's car backed out and drove away. She never saw the vehicle the two men came in. For the next three hours she studied every car, van and truck that had driven past their house in the last two weeks. She wrote down their descriptions and cataloged when each one drove past and how many times and what direction they were going and anything else she could think of. She was secretly afraid she was being watched somehow but then she dismissed that as too crazy. She had to figure this out and get Jethro home. In less than two weeks.

Jethro slept fitfully for almost three hours that night and those were the last consecutive hours of sleep he would get for many nights. Sometime in the middle of the night two men came into the room and drug him from there to a room down the hall. Without ever speaking they cuffed his hands together above his head then secured them to a large hook hanging from the ceiling. In essence he became a human punching bag. For the next hour the men took turns hitting him just as if he was the heavy bag in a boxing room. They wore sparring gloves but that was more to protect their hands than to lessen the effect the punches had on Gibbs. The men worked on their punches exactly as they would have if they were working the heavy bag. They never hit him in the head or below the waist but they did major damage to his entire torso and his face. Finally, they stopped and left him hanging there his feet barely touching the ground and his legs barely able to hold him up. Truthfully, he was hanging by his arms, most of his weight on his shoulders. When the men had rested they threw a bucket of ice water on him, took him down, removed the handcuffs, and drug him back to his bed.

It felt so good to lie down Gibbs again almost cried in relief. The beating had been painful to say the least but he knew they had not inflicted any permanent damage. Yet. They were obviously skilled boxers and knew what they were doing. It was very unnerving not to be able to see what was coming. He poked gently on his ribcage and abdomen and was satisfied he didn't have any broken ribs. Yet. He had a bad feeling that little exercise was just a warm-up; just the beginning. He was right.

Just when he had fallen asleep after the beating Gibbs was jolted awake by water pounding down on him. Cold water. He tried to scramble away from it but it was all over the room. There was no place to hide; no place to get away from it. This went on for hours and by the time it stopped Gibbs was shaking uncontrollably. When the water stopped cold air began blowing into the room. That lasted until Gibbs thought he was going to freeze to death. Then abruptly it stopped. Gibbs was deathly cold and so hungry he was faint. The door slammed open and a man told him to stand up. He did. He heard the man leave and close the door so he sat back down on the bed.

That was a mistake. The man roared back into the room and jerked Gibbs off the bed by his ankle. Gibbs slammed onto the floor on his back and the man kicked him in the groin several times. He grabbed him by the hair and jerked him up.

"I said stand up. I didn't say sit down. Now, stand up until I tell you otherwise."

The man let go of Gibbs and slammed back out of the room. Gibbs was holding his crotch and trying very hard to catch his breath. At least he knew for sure now that they could see him even if they were not in the room. Certainly a painful way to learn that piece of information. He stood up and tried to think of something pleasant to take his mind off the pain he was feeling. All he could think of was Ziva and that caused almost as much pain as the beatings. Instead he focused on boot camp and how he had survived what at the time, had seemed like brutal treatment for thirteen weeks. Surely he could survive two weeks of this. Or not.

The man never came back to tell Gibbs he could sit. After what seemed like several hours Gibbs simply collapsed from pain and exhaustion. He lay in a heap on the floor until the door opened and a different man came in and nudged him awake with a boot to the butt. Gibbs crawled onto the bed and the man handed him a ham sandwich and a can of Coke. Gibbs tried to eat it slowly but he was so hungry he practically inhaled both the sandwich and the drink. He laid back down and didn't even notice when the water began pouring down again.

The punching bag routine was repeated again the next morning but this time kicking was included. Gibbs didn't last very long when that started. The men took him down from the hook and let him lay on the cold stone floor. No one ever spoke to him during these beatings. He knew he was intentionally being deprived of any human connection except the connection of fists and feet to his body. After he had been lying on the floor for about thirty minutes one of men nudged him to get up. He was told to hold his arms out straight to the side and if they dropped below shoulder level a man behind him hit him with a bamboo rod on the back. This lasted about an hour until Gibbs could not raise his arms anymore. The men who were both smoking cigars during this time, then took turns putting their cigars out on Gibbs back and chest. Never during any beating did Gibbs utter a moan or groan but burning was different. He screamed the first time the man behind him touched the lit cigar to his shoulder blade. After that he gritted his teeth and refused to give them the satisfaction of knowing his pain.

The beatings continued every day, always twice a day. The room where Gibbs was being kept was either freezing cold or, starting on day four, stiflingly hot. The second punching bag session of day five was the worst so far. The men were hitting harder and more often. The gloves had come off; figuratively and literally. There were more punches to the face and kicks to his thighs, knees and groin. Unbeknownst to Gibbs this beating, like all the others, was being filmed. After the beating was mercifully ended, Gibbs was almost unconscious from the pain. The men drug him back to his bed and left him there. Every part of him hurt and the lack of vision was now a huge issue for Jethro. He was constantly disoriented and fearful because he never knew when someone was coming toward him. He had no idea if it was day or night and no idea how long he had been held. He felt like he was slowly losing his mind. Fear was not an emotion Gibbs spent much time with even when he was at war but he was beginning to be very fearful every time the door opened.

Mr. Smith had not talked to Gibbs since the first day. He watched every beating and knew exactly what had been done to him every step of the way. In fact, he was directing the men in the specifics of the torture. He let them have some leeway in the process but he made sure they never let up. He took the recording of the last beating and gave it to a trusted courier. Three hours later it was delivered to the Gibbs residence. Ziva found it taped to the front door when she arrived home after work. When she saw the disc Ziva knew it would be about Jethro.

Ziva had told everyone at NCIS that Jethro had an emergency and would be spending some time at his cabin in West Virginia. She said very little else and her demeanor told the team not to ask any questions. Luckily for her, Abby was gone for two weeks to a seminar and to visit her family in Louisiana. She told Director Vance Jethro was taking some much needed time off and had left over the weekend. She apologized for the lack of notice but explained it couldn't be helped. If anyone wondered why Gibbs didn't call they never asked. Ziva knew they didn't really believe her but no one wanted to be accused of sticking their nose in Gibbs' private life. Now she stood in the middle of the living room staring at the disc in her hands.

The evening of the fifth day, while Ziva was staring at the disc, Mr. Smith entered Jethro's room and sat in the chair facing his prisoner. Jethro was barely aware the man was there. Mr. Smith motioned to one of the men behind him and the man brought in some food. He put the tray down on the bed then helped Jethro sit up against the wall. He put the tray next to Jethro and stepped back.

"Some food Agent Gibbs. Steak and French fries and iced tea. It's all cut up for you so just use your hands. Go ahead. I'll talk while you eat."

Jethro was so tired and in so much pain he had no interest in food but he knew he needed to eat. This was only the second meal he had been given in five days. He needed to regain some strength and get his wits about him. The last five days had been about the most difficult of his life and he knew if he was going to do more than just survive he had to try and get himself back together mentally. He couldn't control what was being done to him but maybe he could control his own mental state. At least he hoped he could. So, he ate the steak and fries and he had to admit it tasted pretty good.

While Jethro was eating, Ziva was watching him being savagely beaten. Ziva had seen a lot of terrible things in her life but seeing the man she loved being so horribly beaten was more painful than anything she had witnessed before. And yet, she couldn't take her eyes off Jethro's face. She looked desperately for some sign he was at least mentally resisting but all she saw was pain. When the video was over she noticed for the first time the note that had come with it.

**As you can see Agent Gibbs is alive. As long as you don't interfere he will stay alive. This was today, day five. Remember, if you look for him or try to investigate this he will be killed. **

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Four

Ziva knew she had to do something to help Jethro. If the man or men who had him intended to keep him for two weeks he would surely not survive based on what they had done in five days. She had deflected all inquiries about Jethro so far with the story about him going to the cabin. Of course everyone was skeptical; Gibbs never took time off. Ziva knew the team probably thought the two of them were having problems and he had left because of that. She hated for them to think that because it was the farthest thing from the truth but it was better than them getting involved and Jethro getting killed. Ziva hated lying to them but right now she felt she had no choice. For the first time she was glad she wasn't still on Jethro's team; it made it easier to avoid them.

Ziva gathered the disc, the two notes from the kidnapper, and all her notes on the vehicle traffic and the discs from the yard light camera, putting it all in her pack. She was going to get help. She left the house with her gym bag in case she was being watched. She drove in the direction of the Navy Yard as if she was going to work out but then she began weaving carefully in and out of traffic smoothly losing herself in DC congestion. When she was certain she was not being followed, she made three more turns and drove into an underground parking garage one block from the Israeli embassy. She walked through the garage to a secret, secure entrance that took her to the back of the embassy. Only persons with the highest clearance were allowed in this area which was out of sight of the public. No one watching the embassy would see her. Once inside, Ziva was escorted to a secure room where she was met by one of her father's most trusted aides.

"Shalom Ziva. What is the trouble? You look very upset."

Ziva greeted Benjamin with two quick kisses, one on either cheek. "I am upset. I need to speak to my father right away. Then I will tell you both at the same time what is wrong."

"Of course my dear."

Moments later, Eli David appeared on a secure video and audio feed from his office in Tel Aviv.

"Ziva what is the matter?" There was never any wasted time or wasted words with Director David.

"Someone has taken Jethro. I have a video of him and notes from the kidnappers. Also, some information about vehicles that may have been watching our house in the last two weeks."

Ziva was speaking very fast in an effort to control her emotions. She hated to cry, especially in front of her father.

"When did this happen?"

"Five days ago. I got the first note the Friday he was taken. It said if I looked for him or contacted anyone, you specifically, Jethro would be killed. If I do nothing he will be returned in two weeks."

"And now you want to do something? Why have you changed your mind? If there are no demands for ransom or trade or information, why not just wait until he is returned?"

Ziva was furious. "Look at the damned video and then ask me that! They are killing him! I don't think he will survive two weeks of what they have done so far." She paused and let her anger shift from her father to where it really belonged; the man who had her husband. "And, I want these men. I want to make sure they pay for this."

Eli did not fail to notice the shift in his daughter. He almost felt sorry for the idiot who had taken her Agent Gibbs. "Show me the video."

Ziva handed the disc to Benjamin who put it in a laptop. The three of them watched it without comment. Ziva closed her eyes much of the time but that didn't stop the images from playing in her mind. Finally it ended.

"I agree Ziva, it looks very bad. But what can you do without making it worse for Jethro. Have you any clues as to who these people are?"

Ziva explained about the video camera in the yard light. She gave Benjamin all the notes she had taken and the disc from the camera.

"Maybe we can track someone from this. I have all the vehicles listed with times and their tag numbers. I did not trace them in case somehow I am being watched or bugged or something. It is a starting point at least."

"I understand. Ben, get your best people on this. Very quietly. Do nothing to compromise Ziva's safety. Or Agent Gibbs'. Now, please give me a few minutes with my daughter."

Ben took the notes and discs from Ziva and gave her an encouraging hug. "We will find these men, Ziva. You have my word."

When Benjamin had gone Ziva turned back to the screen and looked at her father. There were tears in her eyes and she fought hard to keep them from spilling over. She failed.

"Ziva, do you have any idea what is going on? Have there been any threats or problems lately? Any cases that could have led to this?"

"No. At least nothing Jethro has told me about. I think he suspected someone was watching the house and that's why he put in the camera. Do you have someone watching us, father?"

"No Ziva. I see no reason to do so. I have no information about a threat to you. If I did I would tell you both. I trust Jethro to take care of you."

Ziva had to smile at that. It had taken a lot of hard work to repair her relationship with her father and then a lot more for Jethro and her father to come to an understanding. Both men loved her fiercely and both were very stubborn. Ziva was very glad they did not live on the same continent.

"I have to go father. No one can know I was here. I will get a secure phone from Benjamin so he can contact me. We have to at least identify these men so when Jethro is back we can make them pay."

"I understand Ziva. Let Benjamin and his team do their work. I will stay in touch with him. Remember, Jethro is a strong man and very determined. He can survive this especially if the man has no intention of killing him. I understand what you need. Take care, Ziva. Shalom."

"Shalom father."

Ziva left the embassy and made her way home. She didn't think she was being followed. When she got home she saw a gray sedan in the block past the house. She went inside and discretely looked out the window. After about a minute she saw the gray car drive past. The driver was a young man with dark hair and glasses. She quickly called Benjamin on the secure phone and told him what she had seen. Two blocks from the house a tan Chevy began following the sedan. He followed the car all the way to Tysons Mall where the man parked and walked to the nearest bus stop. The Mossad agent in the Chevy photographed him and the vehicle and then drove on. The agent reported what he had seen to Benjamin and noted in his report the man was wearing gloves even though the weather did not call for them. Another agent was sent to watch the car but the driver did not return. Two hours later a tow truck arrived and the car was towed to a private garage used by the Mossad. It was a beginning but a very small one.

Jethro ate all the steak and fries and drank all the tea. He had trouble chewing because of the pain in his jaw. He was sure he had some loose teeth. He could sense Mr. Smith was still there. He could hear his breathing. As he finished the last of the tea he put the glass down carefully.

"Can I ask a question?"

"Of course Agent Gibbs."

"Why are you doing this to me?"

Mr. Smith just laughed. "Because I can. Because I have hated you for a long time. Because of all the pain you caused me."

"What did I do to you?"

"Nothing directly. But sometimes our actions have far reaching effects Agent Gibbs. Effects we never know about. That is the case here. You will never know who I am or exactly why you're here. Just accept that I want you to suffer. But only for two weeks. I've suffered much longer. And in reality you will as well. You will never really recover from this experience. It will haunt you for the rest of your life. You will forever be looking over your shoulder, knowing I could reappear in your life at any moment just as I appeared five days ago. I can't imagine you will ever be truly at ease when your precious Ziva leaves the house without you. You will always be waiting, watching."

Speaking of your wife, do you wonder if she's looking for you? She's not. She told your colleagues at NCIS that you are taking some time off at your cabin in West Virginia. She is being watched by one of my men and I can tell you with confidence she isn't making any effort to find you. Of course that might be because I told her I'd kill you if she did. Or, maybe she's just not that concerned. I let her know you'd be back in two weeks if she left it alone. I guess she's decided to just wait. Pity. Who knows if you'll actually survive the two weeks?"

Jethro heard the chair scraping on the floor and sensed Mr. Smith standing up. "That's all for now, Agent Gibbs."

After the man left, Jethro thought about what Smith had said. The food had helped a little; his mind was a little clearer than it had been for days. He knew that no matter what happened in the next few days his focus in the future would be to find this mysterious Mr. Smith and kill him. He would not live the rest of his life with Ziva in danger or looking over his shoulder waiting to be snatched again or killed. He didn't pay as much attention to what Mr. Smith said about Ziva not looking for him. He didn't believe it. He couldn't. She'd find a way. She had to because Jethro knew Mr. Smith was right; he very well might not survive for nine more days.

No one returned to his room the rest of the evening or through the night. That was the first time he had been left alone for more than two hours at a time since he had been taken. When Jethro woke up the next morning, he wondered if they had fed him and let him sleep because they were taking him home. He didn't really think so. Gibbs decided Mr. Smith was most likely a relative; most likely the father of someone he had arrested or killed. He knew the depth of rage and hatred a father can feel when his child is killed. He understood that if Mr. Smith was such a person, the rest of their time together was likely to be very painful. For the first time in many years Jethro prayed. He asked God to give him the strength to survive the next few days so he could at least see Ziva one more time and tell her how very much he loved her.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and alerts. You know it makes the author feel good!

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Five

Day six began like the previous five had; with a beating. When the men grew tired of hitting him they left him hanging by his wrists for almost two hours. When they finally came back they unhooked him, removed the cuffs and drug him outside. Jethro was barely aware of his surroundings but he did realize he was smelling fresh air for the first time in six days. He tried to inhale as much of the sweet, clean air as he could but he found that taking a deep breath was not possible. He couldn't inhale deeply without considerable pain. That was a new and very scary discovery.

The men led Jethro out into the yard and cuffed him, arms outstretched, to two posts. The sun felt good on his battered body but he didn't have time to enjoy it. The next thing he knew the men were taking target practice with paint ball guns and he was the target. After about ten very painful shots the men stopped and turned a water hose on him. Actually it was more like a fire hose in that the pressure was very strong. If he had not been cuffed to the posts Jethro would have been knocked down by the force of the water. The men walked around the yard spraying him from all sides. It was like being beaten all over again. Finally they turned the pressure down by about half but they held the spray directly in his face. Jethro thought he was going to drown. He tried to breathe through his nose but it was so swollen from being punched he could barely get any air.

At this point, in extreme pain, half starved, blind and with no means of self defense, Jethro was ready to give up. He opened his mouth and let the water flood in. Of course he couldn't swallow fast enough and soon he was choking and coughing. The men saw what was happening and turned off the water. There were not supposed to kill him after all. Mr. Smith was watching from inside the house and was about to intervene when the men realized they had almost gone too far. One of the men checked on Jethro and found him breathing so he punched him hard in the stomach causing Gibbs to vomit up most of the water he had swallowed. He was so weak he was desperate to lie down but the men left him suspended between the posts in the afternoon sun. They did not return for several hours.

By the time the men did return, Jethro had passed out. They checked to make sure he was still alive then uncuffed him and let him fall to the ground. Jethro woke up two hours later and found he was now shackled to one of the posts by a strap around his left ankle. He figured it was night time because it was cool and he could hear night sounds in the nearby woods. He was lying in mud; the mud created by all the water sprayed on him earlier. He still had trouble taking a deep breath and feared he had at least one broken rib. He hurt all over.

Jethro had concentrated on NOT thinking about Ziva because it hurt so much to think he would not see her again. Now he quit fighting that and let his mind wander to a happier place; a place where they were together and nothing could hurt them. He let himself think about the night she came to him and told him she was going to leave NCIS because she couldn't work with him any longer without telling him how she felt about him. He remembered very clearly standing in his basement in shock at her declaration. He pictured in his mind how she was standing on the bottom step, face-to-face with him when she said she loved him but she couldn't see him every day knowing she couldn't do anything about it. Jethro saw himself standing there, staring at her, not knowing what to say. When she turned to leave he had the good sense to stop her with a hand firmly on her wrist. She turned back then and he kissed her. Not a fatherly kiss but a kiss that told her she was not the only one who had been fighting their feelings.

After that first kiss there was no turning back. No stopping to think about the consequences of what they were doing. All they wanted was each other. Jethro played the entire night over in his head that night, shackled to a post in the mud, hurt and scared and desperate to get back to his wife. In his mind he watched as they made their way upstairs to the bedroom, never letting go of each other. He replayed how they had undressed each other, taking their time even though it seemed the anticipation would kill them. The first time he touched her breasts, the first time he saw her nude, the first time he heard her call his name as he entered her; all these things swam through his head and somehow gave him hope. As much as his body hurt, his heart ached at the memory of their first time together. He woke up then, in the middle of the night, alone and cold and in pain but he knew he could survive whatever crazy Mr. Smith had planned. He knew in his heart that Ziva was not just sitting at home waiting for him to be brought back. He knew she would either find him or find the man who took him. All he had to do was survive. All he had to do was keep breathing and in a few days he would be home and Ziva would be there and he would be okay.

Sometime before dawn, the men came and got Gibbs, dragging him back into the house. He was thrown into a very small room, not much bigger than a closet. He lay on the floor drifting in and out of sleep until again, the water started pouring down on him. First it was cold then hot then cold again. He couldn't get away from it. He wanted to see so desperately he had to fight himself to keep from ripping off the patches. The only thing that stopped him was the belief that Mr. Smith would in fact break his arm and then cuff him with his hands behind his back. Jethro knew he couldn't stand that kind of pain for long. So, he stayed blind and tried to think about being in the shower with Ziva instead of trapped in this hell hole.

The next few days were more of the same and some new painful experiences thrown in. Every morning started with a beating, some more fierce than others but each one painful and more difficult to endure than the last. On day seven the bamboo rods were back, and the cigars. On day eight the men introduced scalpels. They made a series of cuts in Jethro's abdomen, back, and legs. Not deep enough to cause any serious bleeding or injury but deep enough to hurt like hell. Jethro remembered seeing a Marine on Ducky's autopsy table who had been cut. He fought to get the memory out of his mind but he began that day to picture himself on Ducky's table, covered in bruises and cuts and burn marks. He tried to think about Ziva instead but it was harder to do these days.

They began feeding him only liquids because apparently they figured out he could barely move his jaw now. Gibbs was sure he had at least a dislocated jaw; his whole face was so swollen and sore it was hard to tell really. He was hungry all the time and absolutely filthy despite all the water torture. His body was really one massive bruise covered in dried blood. His surgically repaired knee would undoubtedly need to be repaired again; he had been kicked there once too often and now could barely put any weight on that leg. He sensed the men were becoming bored and that was leading them to do different and more sinister things.

On the morning of day ten, Mr. Smith came to the room where the beatings always took place. While the men were getting Jethro ready, he spoke.

"I thought you should know, Agent Gibbs that your wife has continued to do just as she was instructed; nothing. She has not brought your team into this situation and is not actively looking for you. She has been sent two, no three, videos of you so she is aware of what is happening to you. At least some of it. You should also know that we are coming to the last several days of your stay with us. Things will change for the last few days beginning today. Not for the better mind you but change all the same."

Jethro had no reply. What could he say really? He tried to close his mind to the pain and focus on breathing. Taking one more breath was about as far ahead as he could think when he was helplessly hanging by his arms and another man was beating the shit out of him. This morning the beating was the worst yet; repeated kicks to his thighs left Jethro unable to stand at all. Thus, all his weight was suspended by his wrists and pulling his shoulders. Eventually his right shoulder dislocated and he screamed in pain. The man hitting him was so shocked to hear him screaming he stopped hitting him.

"My shoulder. God, please, let me down." Jethro could barely breathe much less speak. "It's out of the socket, please, let me down."

The man looked over at Mr. Smith who nodded. In seconds Jethro was uncuffed and fell to the floor writhing in pain. The two men sat him up and grasping his shoulder and arm, popped it back into place. Jethro screamed again and then passed out. The men left him on the floor for a couple of hours then drug him back to his bed.

As the days passed and Ziva received the next two discs she fought the despair they created in her. She was in daily contact with Benjamin and her father through the secure phone. She knew Benjamin had stationed men around the neighborhood and on day ten she came home to find one of his operatives in her living room. He told her they had several men staying in various houses up and down the street; house guests who were paying the residents a healthy sum to ask no questions. There were also men doing yard maintenance, utility work and various other jobs that allowed them to monitor the traffic in the neighborhood without raising suspicion.

That night she took a call from her father. "Ziva, Benjamin tells me they have managed to track the courier as far as a town called Warrenton. They believe the man who has Gibbs is in the Shenandoah forest near there. What do you want to do?"

"Do they have a location for sure?"

"No, they did not follow the man out of the town for fear of him spotting them. The area is remote with little traffic. The blue van that you saw on the video was also seen in Warrenton at a grocery store."

"That cannot be a coincidence. Warrenton is not that close to here. It must be them." Ziva stopped and took a deep breath. She hated that she was so helpless. With an uncharacteristically shaky voice she asked, "What should I do father?"

"I think you have to wait, Ziva. The other option is for Ben to send some men to survey the area. However, if that draws suspicion or they are seen the man may retaliate by killing Gibbs. Wait for the man to bring Jethro back and then we will catch him. We have your neighborhood covered very well. If the man brings Jethro home as he has said he will, our men will capture him."

"And do what with him?"

"Whatever you wish."

"I will have to talk with Jethro about that. If you apprehend him, will you be able to hold him for a while?"

"Ziva, not 'if" but when we apprehend this monster, we will hold him for as long, or as short a time as you and Jethro decide. Do not worry about the legalities of the situation if that is what troubles you."

"Thank you father."

"Ziva listen to me. You and I have had our difficulties but those are in the past. I made a lot of mistakes as a father I know that. There is nothing in this world I will not do for you or for your husband. You understand this do you not?"

"Yes, I understand. I leave the rest of this operation to you and Benjamin. All I can do is wait and hope."

"Correct. I think you must be ready if this goes past two weeks. Benjamin and his men are ready now and will be ready until Jethro either comes home or we decide he is not coming and take another action. Try to rest, Ziva. Shalom."

"Shalom father. And thank you."

The afternoon of day ten the men took Gibbs back outside and shackled him to the post again. They told him to stand there and if he sat down they would cuff him again. Then they just walked away and left him there in the hot sun. Later, they began the paint ball routine again but this time it was completely random; two or three shots at a time and then none for a while, then one, then several. Just when he would think they were through another one would strike. Jethro put every ounce of mental energy he had into thinking about Ziva. He relived their first night together over and over again. He imagined he could feel her fingers on his face, feel her lips soothing his pain and loving him. He listened to her whispering his ear that she loved him as she lay breathless on his chest. Just keep breathing he told himself. All he had to do was take the next breath; Ziva was waiting.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Six

For the next four days Jethro was kept in a room no more than five feet square. He could not lie down and stretch out. He could barely stand up straight because the ceiling was so low. The room, if you want to call it that, was either very cold or very hot. Most of the time there was a buzzing sound coming from somewhere. Other times, mostly in the night, there would be loud music or sirens or screaming coming from speakers somewhere in the room. The intent was to keep Gibbs from sleeping or even being able to think. It was working. He was beginning to doubt his own sanity and seriously doubt that he would ever go home.

Food was scarce those days as well. It didn't matter much though because the pain in his jaw and his chest was so pervasive and so overpowering that Jethro couldn't really eat much anyway. The men resorted to giving him energy drinks. There was no water pouring down on him at least. The alternating temperatures were making him sick on top of everything else. He coughed fitfully at night in the cold which hurt his chest even more. All in all, his physical condition was rapidly deteriorating and his mental status wasn't far behind. He kept fighting though. Kept pulling out a mental picture of Ziva. Kept breathing.

Day fourteen finally arrived although Jethro had no idea what day it was or how long he'd been held. Ziva was pacing the floor from early morning on. She figured Jethro was taken on a Friday two weeks before so if the man kept his word, a big if of course, Jethro should be home today.

On the final day of his captivity Jethro was taken from his room at 7:00 am. He had not been hung by his wrists since the day his shoulder dislocated but today they returned to that practice. They didn't care what happened today as long as they didn't kill him. The men beat Jethro savagely on that last day. They broke two ribs, tore his knee ligaments by kicking him in the side of the knee and finally managed to fracture his jaw. At least it felt like it was broken; Jethro could barely open his mouth. The internal damage they had caused over the past fourteen days was yet to be discovered but it was already having its effects. The pain was so intense by the time they dropped him to the floor Jethro was unable to move and was barely breathing.

The men began packing up and clearing the house but Gibbs didn't know it. He mercifully drifted into unconsciousness and stayed that way for three hours until Mr. Smith woke him with a bucket of ice water to the face. Jethro groaned and tried to decide where he hurt the most but that was an impossible task. Breathe he told himself, just keep breathing no matter what. If he kept breathing he would see Ziva again.

"Agent Gibbs you are going home today. You have managed to survive fairly well but I believe I have made an impression on you these past two weeks. You will eventually heal from your physical injuries but I doubt you will ever mentally be the same man you were two short weeks ago. Keep in mind that I will be watching you. And your beautiful, young wife. Now, I think the boys have a couple of more things in store for you before I drop you off at home. This is the last time we will speak, Agent Gibbs. For now at least."

Mr. Smith left Jethro on the floor and spoke to his men in the other room. "He looks like he might be going into shock. Be careful with him. I want him alive when I drop him off. He might not stay that way but I want him to be alive then. Understand?"

"We understand. Are you sure you want to take him yourself?"

"Yes. You two must disappear. You have done very well here but if I ever see you again I will not hesitate to have you killed."

Both men nodded. They, like the original kidnappers, were hired for their discretion as much as their "special skills". They didn't want a dissatisfied customer on their record. They packed their few belongings, stowed their bags in their truck and prepared to finish off Jethro's punishment.

First they put his clothes back on him. He had lost a lot of weight in the last two weeks so his pants and shirt just hung on him. They didn't bother with shoes. They were not gentle when dressing him and every movement caused excruciating pain for Jethro. When he was dressed they used the scalpels to made several deep cuts in his palms then they got his right arm in a bind and broke it. Jethro passed out. They woke him up a few minutes later with ice water in the face. When he managed to get his breath he began coughing and spitting up blood. The two men looked at each other and shrugged.

"Guess we better quit or he won't survive long enough to get home."

"Yeah, let's throw him in the van and get the hell out of here."

They carried Jethro to the van, dumped him in the back and covered him with a tarp. Then they doused the house inside and out with gasoline and walked out to the van. Mr. Smith was waiting for them. He had checked on Jethro and found him barely breathing. He paid the men, got in the van and watched as they set the house ablaze. The men all drove off, the two in their pickup following Mr. Smith as far as town where they would head away from DC while Mr. Smith and his cargo headed to the nation's capitol.

When the blue van came into town followed by the black pickup, Benjamin's men were waiting. As the pickup turned off, a black SUV followed several cars behind. The van was followed by a series of different vehicles each driven by a Mossad officer.

Ten miles out of town on a two lane road with very little traffic the SUV forced the pickup off the road in what might have seemed to a passerby an ordinary accident. The men in the SUV approached the pickup and Mr. Smith's men got out as well. A short while later Smith's men were lying in the ditch beside the road, covered by one agent while the other searched their truck. He found the money and when the two Israelis "explained" their "options" to them the men told them what they needed to know. The men were each given an injection and put in the back of the SUV where their heads were covered with black bags. Their truck mysteriously caught fire.

The Mossad officers called Benjamin and explained that Jethro was indeed in the blue van and the man driving was the person behind the entire ordeal. They asked what they should do with the men they had and were told to take them to a safe house in Arlington.

In the van, Mr. Smith smiled to himself. The plan had gone just as he wanted. Gibbs had suffered considerable pain and as far as he could tell was not in very good shape at the moment. He honestly did not want Gibbs to die; that would spoil the whole idea of him looking over his shoulder the rest of his life. Of course, Mr. Smith had no intention of ever being within a thousand miles of DC after today. Once he dumped his cargo he was heading straight to National Airport for a flight to London. He had no plans to return to the United States anytime soon. No, his threats of future action were just that, threats. He was satisfied with what he had done and had no desire to risk Agent Gibbs tracking him down somehow.

Jethro groaned and tried not to move. He could tell he was in a vehicle of some sort and they were moving. He was going home. Ziva would be there and everything would be okay. At least he would get to see her and touch her again. And feel her touching him. He had a strange feeling in his chest and all over really. He didn't feel right. Breathing was really tough and it felt like something was wrong in his gut. He coughed and tasted blood in his mouth. That scared him. No wonder something didn't feel right. He was lying on his back covered by a tarp or something. He knew his right arm was broken; he remembered that happening. And his knee was blown and his jaw felt like it was in pieces. With his left hand he reached up and began tearing at the tape on his eyes. The men had changed it several times but it was a little bit loose and he was able to pull it off. He didn't care if Mr. Smith saw him or not. He was past caring now. He was desperate to see Ziva and he figured if he didn't see her right away when he got home he might not last long enough to see her later. Finally the tape gave way and he pulled the gauze pieces off his eyes. He rubbed his eyes carefully but still couldn't see. He wondered if he was really blind. That put him in a bit of a panic and he pushed the tarp off. He could barely see some light so he knew he wasn't blind but the effort to accomplish that small task had exhausted him and he gave up and drifted off.

About two miles from Gibbs' house, Mr. Smith pulled into a strip mall parking lot and checked his cargo. He saw that Gibbs had pulled the tape and patches off his eyes and pushed the tarp back a little bit. He felt for a pulse and found one; weak but still there. Gibbs' breathing was shallow and sounded wet to Mr. Smith. That was a bit troubling but he would last another few minutes. Mr. Smith positioned Gibbs near the side door of the van and put the tarp back in place covering him up. He wanted to be able to dump Gibbs and get away in just a few seconds. He noted the time and was pleased to see he was right on schedule. He wanted to dump the body during the afternoon before people came home from work so there would be very little traffic on the street. He was glad Gibbs lived in a quiet neighborhood; that made things easier.

Returning to the driver's seat, Mr. Smith pulled out of the parking lot and drove toward Gibbs' house. He was planning to drive past once just to make sure no one was outside in the immediate area. As he approached the house he saw a lawn service truck in the next block but no other vehicles or people about. Good, he thought, we can get this done and I will make my plane without rushing. Mr. Smith drove around the block and noticed the lawn service truck leaving as he drove up to the Gibbs residence. He stopped at the entrance of the driveway, stepped between the seats and opened the sliding door from the inside. He threw the tarp in the back and with his foot on Jethro's back rolled him out of the van and onto the driveway.

"Goodbye Agent Gibbs," he said as he slammed the door shut and got back in the driver's seat. Mr. Smith drove off smiling.

Three blocks away as he came to a stop sign, Mr. Smith was startled when two men approached the van with guns drawn and pointed at him. They wore no uniforms and he did not see any police vehicles in the area. He was about to drive off when a black SUV with very dark tinted windows pulled in front of him blocking his way. One of the men wrenched open the driver's door and pulled Mr. Smith out. Without a word he shoved him into the SUV and they sped off.

When the van pulled up at the house the Mossad officer inside had to hold onto Ziva until the man drove away. He had strict instructions not to allow her outside until Gibbs was out of the van. The fear was that if the man saw her there he would drive off with Gibbs still inside and that would probably result in at least one person's death; probably Gibbs'. The van was at the corner, a hundred yards away when the man released Ziva and reached for his phone to call 911.

Ziva ran to Jethro who was unmoving in the driveway. He was little more than a heap, lying on his left side, one leg splayed out and his right arm hanging across his abdomen. Ziva gasped when she saw him. He looked like he had been in a bomb blast or some kind of horrible accident. She was terrified to move him but she had to see his face and find out if he was alive. Carefully she rolled him onto his back. She barely recognized him. His face was swollen and horribly bruised and cut. She could see blood in his mouth and on his chin.

"Jethro, Jethro wake up. You are home now. I am here. You are going to be alright." Tears streaming freely down her face Ziva very gently traced her fingertips down his battered face. She could feel his chest moving but just barely. Not knowing the extent of his injures she was fearful of touching him anywhere that might hurt him. But, she had to have some physical contact with him. She knew he would feel her presence so she hovered over his body whispering in his ear that she loved him and that he was going to be okay. She hoped with all her heart and soul that was true.

While they waited for the ambulance, Simon, the man who had been staying with Ziva, came out and knelt beside her and Gibbs. He told her they had captured the driver of the van and taken him to a safe house where he would be held until she and Jethro told Benjamin what they wanted done with him. After what seemed an eternity but was only about five minutes an ambulance arrived and Jethro was carefully loaded onto a gurney.

"You coming with us?" the EMT asked Ziva.

A police car was pulling up and Ziva looked at Simon who motioned for her to go. "I will handle things here and lock up the house. Good luck Ziva."

She wondered very briefly just how Simon would "handle things" but she didn't really care. Whatever official business had to be dealt with could wait; all she cared about now was Jethro. She watched as the paramedic worked on Jethro, getting oxygen going and trying to determine the extent of his injuries.

"What the hell happened to this guy?"

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks again for the reviews and alerts. This is the only chapter for tonight. I am adding one or two chapters on the end so I don't want to keep you waiting too long between chapters. Thanks for reading and for your patience on the next few chapters.

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Seven

"He was kidnapped two weeks ago and has been tortured. The kidnapper just dumped him in the driveway a while ago. What do you think of his condition?"

"Well, he's breathing but just barely. He's in pretty bad shape, ma'am. Looks like his arm is broken and his jaw is pretty swollen. Probably has some internal injuries if those bruises are any indication. Lucky for him we're only a couple of minutes from the best trauma center in the city."

Ziva wiped her eyes and continued to stroke her fingers lightly up and down Jethro's left arm. He never stirred during the trip to the hospital. At the hospital, Gibbs was whisked into a trauma treatment room and a nurse began asking Ziva for his information. Ziva wanted to be with Jethro but the nurse persuaded her to wait just a few minutes and give her the information she needed.

"I know you want to be with your husband but we need to know some things first. I will get you in there as soon as possible. Has your husband been here before as a patient?"

"Yes, several times."

"Okay, we'll get his record and that will make things go quicker. Tell me what you know about your husband's injuries."

Ziva gave the woman a quick summary of what she knew about Jethro's beatings. " I do not really know what all was done to him. He has been gone for two weeks. Please, let me in there. He will be looking for me."

The nurse took Ziva into the room and positioned her at the foot of the bed where she was not in the way of the many doctors and nurses who were gathered around him. She put her hand on his ankle and gently rubbed his leg. He was so still it frightened her. She could see he was hooked up to oxygen and a heart monitor and several iv's of what she didn't know. He was stripped of his clothes and for the first time Ziva could see the extent of the damage to his body. It was incredible to her that he was still alive.

A doctor came toward her. "I'm Doctor Phillips. This is your husband?"

"Yes. He's a federal agent, Jethro Gibbs."

"Okay, Mrs. Gibbs, your husband is in pretty bad shape at the moment. We are going to get some x-rays and a CT of his head to see exactly what we're dealing with. I suspect he has some internal injuries. His breathing is very labored, his pulse and blood pressure are pretty low. He has a broken arm and I suspect some broken ribs as well. The swelling in his face and jaw leads me to wonder if he has a fracture there too. His knee is in bad shape but I'm not too concerned with that right now. He's stable for the moment. I'd like for him to wake up though so why don't you talk to him and see if you can rouse him."

Dr. Phillips stood back and allowed Ziva to move closer to Jethro's head so she could talk to him.

Ziva hesitated just a moment trying to figure out where to touch her husband that wouldn't hurt him. She leaned down and brushed a kiss softly against his mouth and then, her tears dripping on his face, she kissed his eyes and let her lips brush all over his bruised and bloody face. She ran her fingers through his hair and with her other hand she gently stroked his chest and side.

"Jethro, you need to wake up. I love you. You're safe now, in the hospital. The man who hurt you is caught. I'm here and I want you to wake up and see me. Please, Jethro, open your eyes for me."

When Ziva started touching him and talking to him the heart monitor showed he knew she was there even if nothing else indicated he heard her. Dr. Phillips smiled at Ziva and gave her a thumbs up.

"He hears you, Mrs. Gibbs. Keep talking to him and touching him. It will help."

"Jethro, I know you can hear me. Open your eyes. You are in the hospital and you are going to be fine. I need to see you look at me, Jethro. Please wake up and come back to me. I love you. I am sorry I did not find you sooner. I did not know what to do. But you are home now and we are going to be fine. Wake up, Jethro and look at me, please."

Ziva straightened up and stepped back as the x-ray tech came into the room.

Dr. Phillips put her arm around Ziva and led her outside into the hallway.

"Give us a few minutes to get the x-rays and scan done. If you have someone to call who can be here with you this would be a good time to do that."

That scared her and Ziva gasped, "Is he dying?"

"He's in bad shape. I'm concerned about internal injuries. We have a surgeon on the way. He has obviously been severely beaten and his body has dealt with a lot of trauma. Sometimes that can lead to shock and if he has internal injuries lots of things can happen and most of them are not good. I want you to have someone here to support you either way. There is a private waiting room right here. I'll send someone to get you when we're through."

Ziva thanked her and turned to go to the waiting room. Standing ten feet away was her father. Suddenly all the tension and fear was too much and she reached for him sobbing.

Eli David was a very powerful and fearsome man. He and his daughter had always had a tumultuous relationship and when she came to America that only got worse. In the past several years they had gone from barely speaking to complete rejection to reconciliation. Ziva's relationship with Jethro had come in the midst of the reconciliation phase and truth be told, he was the one who pushed her to make amends with her father. Even though there was a time when Jethro would have gladly killed Eli David, he understood how much a man can grieve the loss of a daughter. And, he knew how much Ziva suffered without the love of her father, the only blood family she had left. So, he put aside his feelings about the Mossad director in favor of helping the woman he loved have her father back. Jethro and Eli had reached an understanding; they both loved Ziva and they both would kill or die for her.

Now Director David held his daughter as she cried into his chest. He stroked her hair and held her tightly as he had done when she was a little girl. Finally she stood back and wiped her eyes.

"Father, what are you doing here?"

"I came to be with you. How is Jethro?"

Ziva took his hand and led him into the waiting room where they sat down. "He is stable. He looks bad, father. He has a broken arm and some broken ribs. He is not awake. I talked to him but he will not wake up. They are doing some x-rays now."

Eli put his arm around his daughter and held her. "He will be alright now that he is back with you. Have you called his father or his team?"

"No, I was coming out to do that now. When did you get here? You never leave Israel, father. Are you sure you should be here? Thank you for coming." Ziva was babbling but she couldn't seem to get control of herself.

"I arrived very early this morning and yes, I am sure I should be here with you. Benjamin has kept me up-to-date on the situation. I can only stay for two days Ziva, but I wanted to see you and Jethro. As soon as we can, we need to talk about what to do with the men we have."

"I know." Ziva pulled out her phone and called Jethro's father. She told him the bare facts of Jethro's condition and he said he would be on his way there in an hour. Next Ziva called Ducky. Of course he was shocked when she told him what had happened because he thought Jethro was at his cabin. He agreed to call the team and said they would be at the hospital soon.

When the phone calls had been made, Ziva and her father discussed a couple of options regarding the men who had taken and hurt Jethro. Her immediate reaction was to kill them and be done with it but she knew her husband might have other ideas.

"Maybe we need to know who they are and that will tell Jethro why this man took him. Can you have Ben's team get their fingerprints? I can have Tony take them back and run them."

"Of course." Eli stood up and went to the door of the waiting room. He signaled to one of the security men waiting outside the room. After a brief conversation, the man stepped away and made the necessary call.

"We will have the prints sent directly to NCIS. Have your Agent DiNozzo talk to Joseph when he gets here."

"Thank you father. For everything. I know it was asking a lot when I came to you with this but I did not know who else to trust. I was afraid I was being watched at work and if I told anyone there it would get out."

"I understand. Do not worry about it. As to these men, people disappear all the time in such a large country as this. It will be taken care of however you and Jethro decide."

A nurse came to the waiting room and told Ziva she could see Jethro. Ziva took her father's hand and he followed her into the trauma area. Eli stood back and watched as Ziva leaned over her husband and kissed him. Ziva began talking to him urging him to open his eyes.

Beneath layers and layers of pain, fear, and shock, Jethro was trying to do as his wife requested. He could hear her on some level and could even recognize her touch but try as he might he couldn't push through to the surface where he knew she was waiting. He had focused so long on just breathing that now it was all he seemed able to do. Opening his eyes was a monumental task he wasn't sure he was up to.

"Dammit Jethro, wake up!" Ziva decided to try another approach since sweetly begging wasn't getting the job done. "I have been waiting for two weeks to see you and you need to open your eyes and look at me. Your father is on his way and Ducky and Tony and everyone else who loves you. Dammit Jethro, my father is here, you need to wake up."

As if those were the magic words, Jethro slowly opened his eyes. He raised his left hand toward her voice and Ziva grasped it, kissing his fingers carefully, mindful of the cuts on his palm.

"Hey." That one word, barely audible, was music to Ziva's ears.

"Hey yourself. Oh my god Jethro I love you so much. You are going to be alright now."

Eli stepped up next to his daughter and looked down on his injured son-in-law for the first time. He was stunned at the extent of the man's injuries.

"Welcome back Agent Gibbs."

"Eli."

Again, his voice was barely audible even to Ziva who was leaning over him a concerned look on her face.

Dr. Phillips stepped up on the other side of the bed. "Agent Gibbs, I'm Dr. Phillips. I'm glad you're awake. Are you able to focus on what I'm saying?"

"Can't breathe"

"That's because you have a punctured lung from a rib fracture. Don't try to talk. I'm concerned you may also have a fractured jaw. Just try and relax as much as you can. I know you're in pain but we can't give you anything right now. Dr. Ryan is on his way and he will have you in surgery soon. I'm going to ask you some questions but just nod or shake your head. Were you hit in the head at all; aside from being hit in the face?"

Jethro carefully moved his head side to side.

"Good. Obviously you have extensive bruising, cuts and abrasions on your face and possibly a hairline fracture of your jaw on the right side. And a broken nose. Your right arm is fractured and will require surgery. Of course you know, you have multiple cuts on your torso, legs and some more serious ones on the palms of your hands. The ones that most concern me are the ones on your left palm. I have plastic surgeon coming to look at that. Some of them probably should have had stitches but it may be too late for that now. The plastic surgeon will evaluate them. Your left knee will require surgery; torn ligaments and I don't know for sure what else they might find when they get in there. I saved the fractured ribs and internal injuries for last because that is where our focus will be next. You need surgery to address some internal bleeding and to deal with two very serious rib fractures. Any questions?"

Ziva looked at Jethro who blinked once for 'no'. She said, "No, I guess not."

Jethro motioned to his eyes and croaked, "Can't see."

Dr. Phillips pulled a penlight from her pocket and looked into his eyes.

"Were your eyes covered while you were held?"

Jethro nodded.

"I don't see any damage. Your sight should come back once you're rested and we can get you cleaned up. I know you've been down the surgery road before and as I said Dr. Ryan is on his way. He will take over once we move you out of the emergency department. I will be honest with you both, your injuries taken individually do not constitute a life threatening situation. However, Agent Gibbs, your body has absorbed a number of traumas over the last however many days and taken together they are very serious. Until Dr. Ryan can get in and see the extent of your internal injuries we don't really know what we're dealing with. Mrs. Gibbs, I will need you to sign some authorizations for the surgery. I'll give you a couple of minutes."

Dr. Phillips and the nurses left the room and Eli gave Ziva a quick hug before he stepped out as well.

Neither of them spoke for a long moment. Finally Jethro was able to squeeze his wife's hand and raise it to his lips. Ziva leaned down and kissed him gently on the mouth. It hurt him to talk but Jethro had a couple of things he needed say before he had to leave her again.

"Listen Ziva. I. Love. You. You kept me breathing. No matter what happens know you saved my life these last days."

That last part scared Ziva and she looked closely at her husband trying to read his expression. His normally beautiful blue eyes were clouded with pain.

"Jethro, I love you with all my heart and soul. You are going to be fine. Frank will fix you up and then you will come home with me. No matter how long it takes I will be with you until you are well. Nothing is going to happen to you now."

"Zee, your father?"

"I called him when you were taken. Some of his men have been looking for you; following what scant leads we had. Today, the Mossad caught the man who took you and the two men who hurt you. They are holding them. We will talk about it later. But you are safe, Jethro. I promise you, you are safe."

Hearing that Mr. Smith was in the custody of the Mossad was almost as good as having his wife holding his hand and kissing him. Almost.

At that moment, Dr. Frank Ryan entered the room and strode to Jethro's bed.

"What the hell happened to you my friend?"

Jethro was suddenly too exhausted to even open his mouth. He just looked at his friend and blinked slowly. Frank put his hand gently on Jethro's shoulder and smiled at him.

"It's okay. Come on let's get you fixed up."

Dr. Ryan signaled to the orderlies who were waiting and they began preparing to move Jethro out of the trauma unit toward the elevators that would take him to surgery. Then he turned to Ziva and said, "He has some pretty serious rib fractures and some internal bleeding but I'll put him back together. Again. But, let's not wait around for things to get worse. Kiss him goodbye and you'll see him in the recovery room in a few hours."

When Ziva did kiss him goodbye she was stunned and frightened to see tears in his eyes. She didn't know what to say so she just squeezed his hand gently and kissed him again. "I love you and I'll be waiting." Then she walked with them to the elevator.

As the doors were closing Dr. Ryan said, "The waiting room is on the fifth floor. This will take a while so don't get nervous. I'll send someone out with an update in an hour or so."

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Eight

Ziva watched the elevator disappear taking her husband to the surgical floor. Her father came to her side and together they waited for another elevator to take them to the waiting area. Director David's security men spread out in the hallway and Ziva felt truly safe for the first time in two weeks. She sat on a small, uncomfortable couch with her father and waited. They had only been there for about twenty minutes when Ducky arrived followed a few minutes later by Jethro's team and Abby.

They each had many questions and when they saw Ziva with her father they knew their boss must be in serious trouble. Ducky, being Jethro's oldest friend and his doctor, took the lead. He pulled a chair up close to Ziva and quietly asked her to tell them what had happened.

Ziva began by apologizing for keeping them all in the dark about Gibbs being kidnapped. She explained about the notes and the videos and how she had secretly contacted her father for help.

"I know you all would have done anything to find Jethro but I could not risk this man finding out I had told you. I did not know how he knew us or how much he knew. Someone was in and out of our house and I was terrified I would give this maniac some reason to kill Jethro."

Ducky reached for her hand and gave it an reassuring squeeze. "We know you did what you thought best. Is there any indication of who this man is?"

Eli spoke up for the first time. "Some of my men are holding the man who orchestrated this ordeal and the two men who carried out the beating of Agent Gibbs. Their fingerprints are being sent to you, Agent DiNozzo. We will do whatever Agent Gibbs and my daughter desire after they have been identified."

Tony had his own ideas of what should happen to the dirt bags but he kept his mouth shut about that. "Ziva, tell us what condition the boss is in."

Ziva gave them a complete inventory of Jethro's injuries and told them what Dr. Ryan had said about the surgery. They all knew Dr. Ryan from Gibbs' previous work related injuries and they knew he was one of the best trauma surgeons around.

"Well, if anyone can put the Bossman back together it's Dr. Ryan. Don't worry Ziva he's in good hands."

"I know McGee."

There wasn't much more to say. They each found a chair or piece of floor and settled down to wait. The first hour was gone and the second one nearly so when a nurse finally came out looking for Ziva.

"Mrs. Gibbs?"

Ziva stood up and everyone else came to attention. "I'm Mrs. Gibbs."

"Dr. Ryan asked me to let you know your husband is doing as well as can be expected. He expects to finish in the next thirty minutes and will come out to talk to you then."

"What does that mean, as well as can be expected?"

"Agent Gibbs had extensive internal bleeding and it has taken a while to get that all under control. I'll let Dr. Ryan give you the particulars. He asked me to apologize for the long delay."

Ziva wasn't sure she felt better but at least she knew the waiting was almost over. She couldn't stand sitting and doing nothing any longer so she began walking up and down the long hallway. Tony had never seen her so upset. The Ziva he was used to seemed invincible and never let anyone see her emotions. No one except Gibbs of course. Tony couldn't stand seeing Ziva so anxious. He got up and followed her down the hall. When he caught up to her, Ziva was standing at the end of the hallway looking out the window.

Tony walked up next to her and put his arm around her shoulders. "He'll be okay, Ziva. You know the boss is the toughest man on the planet."

"You didn't see him Tony. I've never seen anyone so badly beaten who wasn't on Ducky's table."

"See, that's what I mean. He's tough. And he loves you too much to let some maniac take him away from you."

Ziva turned to face Tony and he wrapped his arms around her protectively. She hugged him tightly, thankful for his concern and his friendship. She and Tony had always had a close relationship; they looked out for each other and gave one another a hard time whenever possible. Ziva knew Tony would do anything for Jethro and she understood he was probably almost as scared as she was.

"Thank you Tony."

"What do you want your father to do with the guy?"

Ziva's eyes sparked and for the first time since he got there Tony saw the Ziva he was accustomed to seeing at work.

"I can think of several things I would like to do myself but of course they are all highly illegal. I will wait to see with Jethro says."

"What if he just wants them arrested?"

"Things happen to people in prison too, do they not?"

"All the time." Tony grinned at her, happy to see the fire back in her eyes. "Listen Ziva, Gibbs will be okay. He'll be a bear in about two days when they won't let him go home. Just remember, you're in charge of him until he gets well but then you better watch out."

Ziva smiled for the first time in a while. "I know. Maybe I will go back to work and leave him at home with his father."

"Jack on his way?"

"Yes. He should be here this evening."

"Come on, let's go sit down. Dr. Ryan should be out pretty soon."

Ziva and Tony returned to the waiting room and fifteen minutes later the door opened and Frank Ryan stepped into the room. The grim look on his face scared everyone especially Ducky who knew a bit more about the dangers of Jethro's condition than did the others. Ziva was too frightened to speak do Ducky stepped forward.

"Frank?"

Dr. Ryan pulled the surgical cap off his head and scrubbed his hand down his face. The tension in the small room was threatening to crush everyone there.

"He's in recovery but it's not good. We lost him on the table once but he's fighting. There was a lot of damage internally and lots of bleeding. His spleen was ruptured and his kidneys are badly bruised. One of the ribs that was fractured punctured a lung. Just an awful lot of trauma over an extended period of time. I'm guessing very little food or water in the two weeks he was gone. We'll see what the next twelve hours bring. I'm sorry I don't have better news, Ziva"

Eli had his arm around his daughter's shoulders and he felt her stiffen. "Will he survive doctor?"

"At this point I can't say. Jethro is a tough guy and I've seen him in bad shape before. This however is different. The human body can only take so much abuse before it begins to shut down. Getting him two or three days ago would have been better but we'll see. I'm not giving up and I know Jethro won't. Ziva I'd like you to come talk to him even before he wakes up. If you're up to it."

"Absolutely. Yes, I want to. Now."

Ziva stepped away from her father and turned to look at the people who each had known and loved Jethro far longer than she. She set her shoulders and in her most determined voice she told them, "Jethro will be fine. Say a prayer for him but know he will be fine."

Then she turned to Dr. Ryan and said, "Please take me to him."

Everyone in the waiting area looked at each other but no one knew what to say. They returned to their seats and five sets of prayers were immediately sent out pleading for their friend, boss and son-in-law.

Dr. Ryan led Ziva into the recovery area and they made their way to Jethro's bedside. There were no other patients in the room which was one reason Dr. Ryan was allowing Ziva there. Plus, he was genuinely worried his friend wasn't going to survive and he was counting on Ziva to work some of her magic on Gibbs. Frank Ryan had known Jethro for many years and had cut and stitched on him more times than he cared to remember. He had always found Jethro to be a bit of a bastard but in a good way. He was stubborn and dedicated to his job and always ready to leave the hospital at least two days before Dr. Ryan thought he should. He was a fiercely loyal friend and Frank loved him like a brother.

Frank had first met Ziva when she brought Jethro to the ER one night for a badly sprained wrist. Dr. Ryan happened to be in the ER on his way home when he saw them. Since he knew Jethro he took charge of the situation much to the delight of the resident covering the emergency department that night. Gibbs was not known for his good manners in the hospital and that night was no exception. What was unusual was the young woman with him and how she managed to corral the infamous special agent and calm him down. Frank had watched that from across the room before he spoke to Jethro and he marveled at what he saw. He told Jethro as much as he was wrapping up his wrist and Ziva was out of the room.

"_Damn Jethro, I've never seen anyone manage you like that young woman does. Who is she?"_

"_What do you mean manage me?"_

"_She tells you to calm down and you do. Who is she?"_

"_Her name is Ziva. She's an agent."_

"_On your team?"_

"_Used to be."_

"_And now?"_

"_Now she's not."_

"_You know, Jethro, I can make this wrist feel a lot better or a lot worse. Spill it."_

"_Her name is Ziva David. She's not on my team anymore because in about a month she's going to be my wife. You happy now?"_

"_The question is are you happy?"_

"_What do you think? Yeah, I'm very happy."_

"_Congratulations Jethro, you deserve it. She know about your propensity for getting shot and blown up and such things?"_

"_Oh yeah. She knows it all Frank and for some crazy reason she still wants to marry me. Go figure."_

"_I'm happy for you my friend. Try and stay out of here for a while will ya?"_

"_I'll try. You'll be getting a wedding invitation. I expect you to be there."_

"_Wouldn't miss it."_

"I know it looks scary but I'd like you to spend some time talking to him. Just let him know you're here and you're waiting for him. A lot of what happens in the next twelve to twenty-four hours will depend on Jethro's will. I need him to fight and you're the person he'll do that for."

"I understand." Ziva, standing at the foot of the bed looked at her beloved husband tethered to so many machines and bags she could hardly believe it. There was a drain coming out of his chest and he was covered with bruises. His right arm was in a cast and his left knee was wrapped and elevated. His cuts and burns had been cleaned and treated with ointment. His left had was heavily bandaged. Finally, his jaw was now back in place held together by a small titanium plate and screws. Dr. Ryan had said the oral surgeon decided it wasn't necessary to wire his upper and lower jaw together which was a relief to Ziva. She didn't want to think about Jethro unable to speak.

After surveying the situation for a few minutes Ziva moved to the side of the bed and leaned down kissing Jethro softly on the cheek. She stroked her fingers gently all over his face and began talking to him in a soothing, quiet voice. She kept her face close to his and repeatedly told him how much she loved him and how she wanted him to come back to her. Eventually she had to sit down so she lowered the bedrail and pulled a stool up close. She ran her fingers through his hair and with her other hand she caressed his chest as carefully as possible. All other sounds and distractions faded into the background as she focused her complete attention on her husband.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Nine

Ziva had been with Jethro for about forty-five minutes when the anesthetic started wearing off and he began the long journey back to consciousness. Ziva stood up and kissed him on each eyelid as they began to flutter. She covered his face with kisses so soft they were barely there but he could feel them. He was trying to pull himself out of the mire of drug induced sleep but the combination of drugs, pain and two weeks of fear and darkness was making that very difficult. Jethro was aware of Ziva hovering over him; maybe only in his subconscious, but aware nonetheless. He desperately wanted to wake up and see her.

The recovery room nurse came to stand on the other side of the bed and she began encouraging Jethro to wake up.

"Agent Gibbs, I need you to open your eyes now. It's time for you to wake up."

Jethro's mind was jarred by the new voice; it wasn't Ziva and it wasn't very friendly sounding either.

"Come on Agent Gibbs. Your wife is here and she really wants to see you."

Dr. Ryan came in and the nurse gave him a progress report. "He's on his way back but he seems to be having some trouble waking up."

Dr. Ryan moved Ziva to the middle of bed so he could examine Jethro. He looked in his eyes and listened to his heart and lungs. Then he leaned over him and began talking to him. "Jethro, old buddy, I need you to wake up. You're going to make me look bad if you don't open your eyes pretty soon. You know how Ziva gets when you don't do what she tells you."

Ziva was running her hand up and down Jethro's right leg. She never took her eyes off his face and when his eyes finally began to open Dr. Ryan changed places with her so she would be the first person Jethro saw.

"Come on Jethro, let me see those baby blues."

Finally, eyes open, Jethro could see his wife clearly for the first time in two weeks. He blinked in the bright light but never took his eyes off Ziva's face.

"Thank you. I love you. You are going to be okay. You are in the recovery room."

Jethro blinked at her twice and then tried to raise his left hand to her face. She caught it on the way up and kissed his fingertips which were the only parts available to her because of the bandages. But Jethro wanted, needed, to touch her. Ziva quickly realized what he wanted and pressed his fingers to her cheek. That brought a faint smile to his face.

Dr. Ryan had taken the nurse's place on the other side of the bed. "We're going to monitor you in here for a little while and then move you to the ICU. I know you have a lot of pain and we will do our best to manage that for you. You had a rough time on the table, Jethro, so you need to sleep as much as possible for the next couple of days. You have a lot of healing to do.

Jethro blinked twice slowly at Frank and nodded his head just a fraction. Then he shifted his gaze back to Ziva. He wanted to tell her he loved her but he couldn't. He blinked at her and reached up to touch her face again.

She couldn't hold the tears at bay any longer. "I love you, Jethro. Just rest."

Jethro closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. _All that work to wake up and now I'm supposed to sleep. It was worth it though. Seeing Ziva is always worth the effort. _

Just as Dr. Ryan had predicted, Jethro was moved to the ICU about an hour later. He remained asleep despite a hum of activity all around him. Dr. Ryan, breaking protocol, allowed each team member to see Jethro for a few minutes. Ducky was allowed to stay in the room with Ziva. When Ziva's father came in Ducky stepped out to speak to Frank.

"Tell me the truth, Frank. How is he?"

"Not good, I'm afraid. There was a lot of trauma internally. Lots of deep tissue damage. His kidneys are terribly bruised; I hope they're still working but we won't know for a while. There was considerable internal bleeding but really the repeated blunt force trauma is the real problem. He's just lucky they didn't hit him in the head like they hit him in the chest and abdomen. If they had he'd be dead now. The arm fracture, the jaw, the knee damage, they're all serious by themselves but taken together with the rib fractures and internal injuries it very well could be too much. He's fighting but I don't know Ducky, this time it might not be enough."

Ducky was stunned even though he had already surmised that Jethro was in very critical condition. He had not allowed himself to think that his friend would not survive. It seemed too cruel. Jethro was just beginning his life with Ziva and had not been as happy in years. They had a good life together and a bright future ahead until two weeks ago. For that to be stolen from them seemed too horrible to accept.

"Don't give up on him Frank. He has a lot to live for these days. Maybe that will make a difference."

"I sure hope so Ducky."

Jethro did not wake up all the rest of that day. In the middle of the night alarms starting going off and he was rushed back into surgery. When he was returned to the ICU several hours later there were even more tubes and wires connecting him to bags and machines that monitored his condition and helped keep him alive. Ziva was exhausted and beyond frightened. She fought despair every moment and when she looked at Jethro she wondered if he would ever hold her again. Ever kiss her and tell her he loved her again.

Jethro's father arrived several hours after his son was moved to the ICU. He was stunned by his condition and refused to leave even after hours of sitting in an uncomfortable chair. He never took his eyes off Jethro and every now and then he got up and moved to the bedside to touch him and tell him how much he loved him. Ziva felt terrible for Jack and tried to offer him some comfort but she was so terrified herself she had little to offer him.

While everyone who loved him worried and prayed Jethro began the slow, difficult work of healing. He wasn't really sleeping; not in the traditional sense of the word anyway. He was unconscious. In that vague area between sleep and coma. His heart was beating strongly forcing blood to all the areas that were so desperately in need of healing. He was breathing on his own with only a nasal canula to assist him. Ziva's voice and touch drifted on the edges of his mind and occasionally his father's gravelly voice pushed into his range of hearing. All the beeping and whirring of the machines, the voices of the nurses and doctors, these were all just vague, blurry sounds. The only sounds he could focus on were the voices of Ziva and his dad.

Gibbs was of course unaware that he had already technically died twice; once on the operating table the first day and the second time in the middle of the night in the ICU. He didn't know about the young surgeon who managed to bring him back that second time or the team of nurses who were somehow keeping both him and Ziva in one piece. He missed the worried looks that Tony and Tim exchanged; the tears silently tracing down Abby's cheeks and the stoic refusal to accept his possible demise that Ducky was exhibiting. He sometimes heard his father but he had no way of knowing how many hours Jack had sat unmoving in the ICU silently praying for him to wake up and be alright. Later, someone would tell him that Ziva never left from the time he came out of surgery until the time he finally woke up four long, frightening days later.

While Jethro was unconscious Ziva had nothing much to do but think and pray for his recovery. When she wasn't thinking about their future she thought about the fact that she hadn't really done anything to help Jethro while he was gone. She thought about how she had made the decision to wait. Wait. She kept replaying Dr. Ryan telling her Jethro would have a much better chance if they had gotten to him two or three days earlier. Ziva couldn't help but think that if her husband died it would be because she had hesitated to allow Benjamin's men to go after him. When she thought about the pain and the injuries Jethro must have suffered those last few days she felt sick to her stomach. Somehow she would have to tell him of her decision and she wondered, feared really, what his reaction would be. Gibbs had always been bold and fearless in his work and Ziva knew without a doubt that if she had been taken he would have moved heaven and earth to find her. There was no doubt in her mind that he would not have simply WAITED.

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

A/N Thank you for the reviews and alerts. Each one is appreciated.

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Ten

After four excruciating days in the ICU, Jethro finally woke up. It was in the middle of the night and when he opened his eyes for the first time in almost five days all he saw was the faint light put out by the machines and dim light coming from the nurses station he could see through the glass that surrounded his cubicle. He blinked a few times and tried to look around a little bit. He glanced down to his left and realized Ziva was asleep in a chair next to the bed her hand holding onto his wrist. Carefully he moved his hand and brushed his fingers on the underside of her arm.

Ziva felt something on her arm and opened her eyes to find her husband looking at her intently in the low light. She smiled and tears of pure joy sprang to her eyes. She immediately stood up and leaned down to look at him more closely. His eyes were clear and he reached up to touch her cheek.

"Oh my god, Jethro I'm so glad to see you awake. I love you so much. Thank you for coming back to us."

Even though she was speaking very quietly, Jack heard her and realized she was talking to Jethro who to his great relief was apparently awake. Jack pushed himself up out of his chair and moved to stand beside his son's bed.

"Hello Leroy. It's about time you came back to us."

Jethro looked from his wife to his father and back to Ziva. He wasn't sure if he could talk or not. He looked at Ziva questioningly and pulled her hand to his lips. Jack stepped outside the door and motioned for a nurse to come in.

Ziva gently ran her fingers across his mouth. "Don't try to talk yet. Let the nurse check you out and then maybe you can have some ice. You've been out for over four days. You are going to be okay, my love."

The nurse stepped in beside the bed and began her assessment. "Hello, Agent Gibbs. We're glad to have you join us. I'm going to check a few things and then I'll let you have some ice chips. You've been out for quite a while and it's good to finally have you awake." All the time she was talking to him she was checking the machines, looking him over and noting his level of alertness. When she was satisfied with what she saw she turned to Ziva.

"He can have a few ice chips at a time but don't over do it. Things look good."

Jethro stayed awake for almost an hour that first time. After some ice chips and some very brief, very croaky comments to Ziva and his dad he fell back to sleep. Ziva was relieved almost beyond words. She wanted to call Ducky and give him the news but when she reached for her phone she saw it was 4:30 in the morning. She decided the news could wait a couple of hours. Jethro woke up again two hours later and they began a new routine of him being awake more and more often during the day. Dr. Ryan came in about 9:00 and was very pleased with Jethro's progress. He had been surprised over the past several days that even though he was not awake yet Jethro had been getting stronger every day. Dr. Ryan was delighted that his friend had surpassed his expectations so grandly.

After two more days in the ICU Gibbs was moved to a private room. He was progressing nicely; getting stronger every day and his bruises were slowly fading away. With his right arm in a cast, his left hand still bandaged and his left leg in a brace he was still pretty much immobile but at least he was free of most of the wires, drains and tubes that been connected to him for the past week. Once it was apparent he was on the mend, Jack went home with Ducky and slept for twelve hours straight. Ziva had been home as well but just for a shower and two hour nap in her own bed.

When Ziva returned that evening she found Jethro awake and staring at the ceiling. Even though he had been awake more lately he didn't seem to want to talk. He was very withdrawn and surly. Ziva attributed it to pain and trauma and tried very hard not to take it personally. Finding him awake she hoped he would be in a better mood. He wasn't.

Ziva bent down and kissed her husband on the mouth. He didn't push her away but he certainly didn't participate like she had hoped he would. She sat down on the side of the bed and asked, "What are you thinking about Jethro?"

When he didn't answer Ziva sat forward and looked him in the eyes. "Talk to me. What is it?"

"Who is he?"

Of course Ziva knew who he was talking about. She had been anticipating this conversation for days. She didn't want any disruptions once they started so she carefully got off the bed and went to the door. She stepped out and spoke to the nurse for a few minutes.

"I don't want anyone walking in on us for a while," she explained to Jethro when she returned.

She pulled her chair up next to the bed and took his hand in hers. He waited patiently for her to begin. "His name is Robert Fuller. You arrested his son-in-law, Jared Stephens, about seven years ago for dealing drugs at Quantico. He went to prison and while he was there his wife, Mr. Fuller's daughter, killed herself and their child. After that the husband also committed suicide. Apparently, Mrs. Stephens had some mental illness and without her husband to around to help her she became very ill. Mr. Fuller said he had been planning your abduction and torture for the past two years. He had a ticket to London in his pocket so he was on his way out of the country."

Gibbs listened to Ziva tell the story and couldn't help but feel sorry for the man. Even after all that had been done to him he understood the pain Mr. Fuller had suffered.

"What do you want to do with these men, Jethro?"

Gibbs was silent for a long time. He knew the fallacy of revenge making you feel better. He was past that. As much as he wanted to make the men who hurt him suffer he couldn't let that determine what he did next. When her finally spoke his voice was flat, devoid of any emotion.

"Send DiNozzo and McGee to arrest them. I can't testify against them because I never saw them. I hope we can make a case against them somehow. There should be plenty of DNA on my clothes so I hope someone thought to keep them."

"Your clothes are in the evidence locker. Bagged and tagged as per regulations. We have an eyewitness to you being pushed out of the van driven by Mr. Fuller. We have taped confessions of all three of them. Of course we will have to deal with the whole Mossad involvement angle but I will leave that to my father and Director Vance to work out. Do not worry, we will make a case. There is another way of course."

"No, Ziva. I won't do that."

"I was only going to suggest that they could move to Israel."

"And be used as training subjects? I don't think that's a good idea."

"Maybe not but it would surely make me feel better."

"No. It wouldn't. Trust me on that. Just call DiNozzo and let's get this done. I don't want to talk about it again."

With that Jethro turned away from her and closed his eyes. He hurt and he was tired and he wanted everything and everyone to leave him alone. Ziva sat watching him for a while then got up and left the room. When he knew she was gone, Jethro rolled onto his back and used the sheet to wipe the tears from his eyes. He desperately wanted his life back; he wanted to hold his wife and tell her everything was going to be okay but he wasn't sure that was true. He couldn't figure out what was wrong with him; he had never been so screwed up. At least not since Shannon and Kelly died. This was different but no less confusing and painful.

For the next two days Gibbs was still asleep more than he was awake but since he was in a private room where he could have some visitors that slowly began to change. Dr. Ryan cautioned him that he still had a lot of healing to do and Jethro didn't have any desire to do much anyway. Ziva was almost as concerned about her husband now as she had been before he left ICU. He had very little to say and spent most of his awake time staring out the window or at the ceiling. When she tried to get him to talk to her he just mumbled that he didn't feel like it. She was beginning to wonder if there was something wrong that Dr. Ryan didn't know about.

What Ziva didn't know, because he wouldn't tell her, was that Gibbs was still in considerable pain most of the time and almost constantly afraid. Of what he couldn't really say but he had such an uneasy, anxious feeling he was afraid to go to sleep and whenever the door opened he tensed up remembering what that had meant during the time he was taken. The fact that he couldn't put all that behind him made him angry with himself which caused him to shut down. Thus, he was not reaching out to his wife or to the other people around him who loved him and wanted to help him.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Eleven

The harder he tried to get his head straight the worse it seemed to get. He wanted Ziva with him but on the other hand he desperately wanted to be alone. He was withdrawn and surly; nothing suited him and no one seemed able to get through to him. Finally, after he'd been out of ICU for four days Ziva had had enough. She had done everything she knew to comfort and support Jethro but nothing she did seemed to be right. If she was gone he wanted her there; if she was there he ignored her. When she tried to get him to talk to her he said he was tired. She was so exhausted from being at the hospital non-stop she was about to need a doctor herself. She decided something had to change.

Just after lunch on that fourth day Ziva moved the meal tray out of the way and motioned for Jethro to make room for her on the bed. She sat down by his hip facing him and took his left hand in hers. She studied his face and tried to read his expression, something she had been able to do with ease until he disappeared. The tension between them was becoming unbearable for her and she sensed, for him too.

"Jethro, do you believe that I love you?"

He never wavered under her scrutiny. He WANTED things to be better, he just didn't know how to make that happen.

"Yes."

"I'm sorry I didn't find you. I'm sorry I didn't do more to get you away from that horrible man. Please forgive me, Jethro."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. And when he saw the tears in her eyes he knew he had to figure out what to do and damned fast. He sat up and pulled Ziva against his chest and held onto her for dear life. It never occurred to him that she had anything to be sorry about. He placed zero blame on her for what happened and it killed him to think she thought he did. He buried his face in her hair and let her cry.

"My god, Ziver you don't have anything to apologize for. None of this is your fault. Please, don't ever think that again. I love you, you have no idea how much."

Jethro pushed her back but only so he could look in her eyes. He covered her mouth with his to stop her from questioning herself. He hadn't kissed her, really kissed her, in so long and it felt amazing. When he broke off the kiss, Ziva reached out to touch his face. She wanted everything he said to be true but she still wondered if there had been something else she could have done. As much as she feared the answer she had to ask the question that had been plaguing her for days.

"Then why are you so angry with me?"

Jethro wasn't really surprised by that question but it still hurt to hear it. He knew he had been shutting Ziva out the past few days. After all they had been through he should have been able to let her in but he hadn't. This was a very new experience for him; the constant pain and the unreasonable fear were driving him crazy. Always in the past he had just plowed through his injuries and gone right on with his life. He was beginning to think Mr. Smith or rather, Mr. Fuller, had been right; he was never going to be the same. That also scared him. What if he couldn't get it together? What if he couldn't go back to work or resume his life with Ziva? He had never questioned himself before and that was just another thing that added to his anxiety.

Ziva was looking at him waiting for him to answer her. He wanted to take away all her doubt and pain. It hurt him doubly because he knew he was the cause of it. He took a deep breath and traced his fingers carefully over her lips.

"I want you to listen to me Ziver. I know I've been a bastard these last few days but you have to believe me when I say, I am not angry with you. You are the only reason I am still alive. Thinking about you, about us, is what kept me breathing every single day I was gone. There is a lot of stuff in my head right now that I don't know what to do with. I'm so sorry I'm hurting you."

"Jethro, it's not you. It is the circumstances that hurt me. I admit I have felt maybe you are angry with me for not finding you. Tell me about this stuff in your head."

"Can we do that later? Can you just lie down here with me for a while. I miss holding you. I miss touching you."

"Of course."

Jethro moved over carefully and Ziva snuggled into his side. After while Ziva sensed he had fallen asleep. She rested her hand on his chest over his heart and closed her eyes. They were going to be fine she told herself.

Two hours later Ducky knocked softly on the door and stuck his head in the room. He found Mr. and Mrs. Gibbs still on the bed. Jethro was awake but Ziva was asleep in his arms. Jethro smiled at Ducky and motioned for him to come in. Then he gently kissed Ziva on the forehead until she opened her eyes.

"Oh my how long have we been asleep?"

"Almost two hours. It was the best sleep I've had in weeks."

"Me too. Hello Ducky, I'm sorry, we are ignoring you aren't we."

"My dear I am all to happy to be ignored if it means the two of you are back on the same page."

"We are Duck."

Ziva carefully got off the bed and excused herself to the bathroom.

"So you could tell something was wrong?"

"Of course, Jethro. How long have I known you? You were back to acting like your old, grumpy, difficult self. Back to your pre-Ziva days as it were. May I ask how you managed to get back in sync with each other?"

Before Jethro could respond Ziva came out of the bathroom and said, "Yes, you may ask and Jethro, please tell him. Maybe he can help with all that stuff in your head. I am going to the cafeteria and see if I can find us a snack." She leaned down and kissed him and whispered in his ear, "I am sleeping with you tonight."

When she left Jethro had a smile on his face that Ducky had not seen in many days. He sat down and waited for his friend to decide how much he was going to share. After Gibbs and Ziva got together Ducky saw such a change in him it was sometimes hard for him to remember the old Jethro. Unfortunately, in the last few days, he hadn't had any trouble recalling those years that Jethro was so closed off and angry with the world. So afraid to allow anyone to see his loving, trusting side. Before Ziva, Ducky hadn't seen that side of Jethro since Paris. He had begun to doubt he would ever see it again. That was not the case once Ms. David got her hands on him and convinced him to give them a chance at love. Gibbs was still just as driven and just as thorough in his pursuit of justice as he ever was but now he was also determined to be happy and to make Ziva happy.

"Well, are you going to tell me or not?"

Jethro chuckled and said, "Yeah Duck I'll tell you but could you give a hand to the bathroom first?"

"Of course."

Ducky helped Jethro to the bathroom and then back. "Would you like to sit in the chair for a while and stay out of that bed?"

"Yes, very much. Thanks."

Ducky helped him settle into the lounge chair and raised the leg support for him. Then he pulled another smaller chair around so they could talk.

Without any preliminaries Gibbs launched into his explanation, "Ziva told me she was sorry she didn't find me. She thought she had let me down by not looking for me. Then she asked me why I was angry with her."

"And what did you say?"

"I told her she didn't have anything to apologize for. That she hadn't done anything wrong. Then I told her I wasn't angry with her. I know I've been a bastard the last few days but I'm not mad at her."

"So who are you angry with?"

"You mean besides the two guys who nearly killed me and the man who orchestrated it?"

"Yes, besides them."

Jethro thought for a moment then said, "Myself."

Of course Ducky had seen that coming a mile away. "Do you want to talk about that?"

"I didn't do anything to try and get away or even resist once they had me. I just let them beat the hell out of me for two weeks and never did a damned thing about it."

"What could you have done? Realistically."

When Jethro didn't answer Ducky went on, "I've seen the videos they sent Ziva and judging by what I saw and your condition, there was nothing you could have done Jethro."

"What videos? What are you talking about?"

"I thought you knew. The man sent Ziva three different videos showing what they were doing to you. They warned her that if she looked for you or contacted anyone they would kill you. Otherwise they said, you'd be returned in two weeks. The videos were very difficult to watch I can testify to that. After the first one Ziva knew she had to do something to try and save you and that's when she went to her father."

Jethro knew none of this because he and Ziva had not talked about anything concerning his kidnapping and torture except when he asked who the man was who had taken him. For the most part they had been so focused on his recovery and working their way back to each other they had not yet spoken in any detail about what had happened to them. Now her unnecessary apology made more sense. It bothered him that she had seen those videos whatever they were.

"Tell me about the videos, Duck."

"They were of you being beaten. The first one came, I believe, four or five days after you were taken and the other two several days apart about four days later. Perhaps you should talk with Ziva about them and the notes that came with them."

"I will."

"What did she mean about the stuff in your head?"

"I told her I wasn't mad at her but I have a lot of stuff in my head I don't know what to do with."

"Such as?"

"I wonder why I didn't resist. It really bothers me Duck. I hate being the victim!" There was a lot more but Jethro was not going to talk about being afraid; not even to Ducky.

"What do you remember about what happened? Start at the beginning."

Ziva was standing just outside the door listening. She very much wanted to hear what Jethro remembered of the kidnapping but she was afraid he would shut down if he knew she was listening so she waited and listened.

Gibbs stared out the window and took a deep breath. He wasn't sure he wanted to relive this but he knew he needed to get it out; for his sake and for the sake of his marriage. He knew Ziva was listening. He could sense her in the doorway but didn't let on. It would be a little easier to do this if he didn't see her face while he was talking.

"I've only been able to remember this stuff in the last couple of days. I remember getting home, I was so tired all I was thinking about was getting into bed. As soon as I got out of the car I got hit in the back of the head. The next thing I remember is being drug into a house. My eyes were taped shut. I was handcuffed. After they took the cuffs off, the man, he said to call him Mr. Smith, said if I tried to uncover my eyes he'd break my arm and then cuff me again. I believed him."

Gibbs' voice was getting softer as he went along. Ziva was having a hard time hearing him but she could tell his emotions were beginning to get the best of him. She couldn't stand it any longer and stepped into the room. She wanted to help him while he told this story if he would let her. Gibbs heard her behind him and reached up his left hand. She grasped it and leaned down to kiss him. He pulled her down onto his lap and rested his head on her shoulder. Ziva ran her fingers through his hair and kissed the top of his head.

"Please go on, Jethro."

"You sure you want to hear this? Ducky told me about the videos. I'm sorry you had to see them."

"You don't have anything to be sorry about. And yes, I want to hear what you remember."

And so, with Ziva in his lap holding onto him Jethro told them everything he remembered about his two weeks in captivity. He talked about the beatings, the water, the cold and the heat. He told them what Mr. Smith said about why he was holding him. He told them everything he could. It took a long time and by the time he was finished he was exhausted, emotionally and physically. Much of what he said was hard to talk about and hard for his wife and his best friend to hear. He never made eye contact with Ducky and never let go of Ziva's hand or looked at her while he was talking. He knew what he was saying was hurting them and he wanted to get it all out so he just stared out the window and kept going until he had recounted that final, awful morning.

"I don't remember anything after I got the tape off my eyes until I woke up here. What happened, do you know?"

Now he looked from Ducky to Ziva wanting to hear what had transpired once he was dumped at home. Ziva took up the story and told him about finding him in the driveway, the ambulance ride and their time in the emergency room.

"That's about all I can tell you except about my going secretly to embassy to talk to my father and Benjamin. We can talk about all that later if you want."

"Yeah, I think I'm done talking for a while if that's okay with you two."

"I agree. But let me say one thing to you Jethro. You say you are angry with yourself because you didn't resist. Let me suggest that you did indeed resist. You stayed alive. You didn't let these men win by killing you or by breaking your mind. In the most important way, mentally, you resisted. Remember that my friend. I am very proud of you Jethro. Most men would have succumbed to their situation and not fought to stay alive."

"Thanks Duck. Most men don't have what I do waiting for them at home."

That earned him a kiss from Ziva and a smile of agreement from Ducky.

"How very true. You two have a good evening and I will see you tomorrow. When do you think you will be released, Jethro?"

"I'm out of here day after tomorrow one way or another. I can sit around at home as well as I can here; better actually."

"We'll see about that but I agree, I think he will be home in two days at the most. There is barely any nursing care he needs and whatever it is I can do it. We need to go home and get our lives back."

"I imagine you're right. Goodnight."

After Ducky left, Ziva and Jethro stayed in the chair enjoying the physical contact they had been missing for so long. They kissed and touched and held each other until finally Jethro said he needed to get up.

"Do you want to lie down or would you like me to get a wheelchair and push you somewhere?"

"I'd like to stand up a minute first. And have you hold me up."

There was a glint in his eye and a smirk on his face that Ziva had not seen in ages. She wondered what he was up to but she didn't really care. It was so nice to have him back she didn't really care what he wanted. She got off his lap and helped him stand up. Jethro carefully put weight on his repaired knee and winced. He backed up to the low counter that ran under the window. Ziva waited until he was steady then carefully stepped into his open arms.

"Now, this is worth the pain of standing on this knee."

Jethro wrapped her in his arms and she in turn wrapped her arms around his torso and rested her head on his chest.

"It does feel very nice to be in your arms. It feels like it has been much longer than three weeks."

Jethro let his fingers skate up and down her back which wasn't all that easy considering his cast and the bandage still on his left hand. But it was better than nothing. They stayed that way, holding onto each other, for almost ten minutes before Gibbs had to give in and get off his leg. Ziva helped him to the bed and he gratefully laid down. She sat down next to him holding his hand.

Ziva looked at her watch and said, "You could have a pain pill if you need one."

"No, I'm alright now that I'm down. Did you mean what you said about sleeping with me tonight?"

"Yes, if it's alright with you."

"It's very alright with me. You sure you'll have enough room?"

"I am sure. I do not want to sleep another night without you."

Suddenly Jethro got very still and a look of doubt crossed his face. He looked past her and sighed. Something was wrong. Ziva waited knowing from experience it was better not to rush right in with questions when Jethro had that particular look in his eyes. Actually there were several looks that told her not to rush in but this one was one of the top three. Her patience was eventually rewarded when he looked at her and then pulled her down for a long, slow kiss.

When he let her breathe he rested his forehead on hers and said softly, "You know it might be a while before I can make love to you."

"I know. I will wait. There are plenty of other things we can do for each other in the meantime."

"What if it's a long time?"

"First of all why are you worrying about this and secondly, I do not care how long it takes. I love you Jethro and if there is a problem with us being intimate we will deal with it."

"Okay, I just had to get that off my chest. I love you, Ziver."

"And I love you. How about I go out and get us some supper. Something besides hospital food. What sounds good to you?"

"I'd love a cheeseburger. And lots of fries."

"Five Guys it is then. You sure you can chew a cheeseburger?"

"Yeah, my jaw feels good. Before you go I need another kiss."

Ziva didn't leave for almost fifteen minutes. One kiss just wasn't enough for either of them.

After they indulged in burgers and fries, Ziva raided the nurses station and managed to score two single serving containers of ice cream. She discovered while talking to the nurses on duty that Gibbs was a favorite even though he had a reputation as a difficult patient. One of the nurses, Ellen, told Ziva she had cared for Jethro a few years ago.

"He has definitely mellowed I can tell you for sure. I think you must have had something to do with that."

"I like to think so. Thank you and thanks for the ice cream. Do you think we could have a Do Not Disturb sign on the door tonight?"

Ellen laughed and promised Ziva that would be no problem.

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: This was originally the end of the story but I decided a bit more was needed so there are two more chapters to do. Thanks for all the reviews and alerts FYI, I am not getting any alerts via email at this time but I check the reviews on the story and try to respond to them.

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Twelve

When Ziva returned with their dessert Jethro was channel surfing looking for a sports program or an old movie. They settled on a Discovery Channel episode about Antarctica. Ziva managed to get comfortable on the bed with her husband and they enjoyed the rest of the evening just talking about the show and the team and nothing really important.

"Would you like for me to rub your back?

"I'd love that but I don't think I can lay on my stomach yet because of the knee."

"Okay, well how about you sit on the side of the bed and I'll slide in behind you. You can rest your leg on the chair."

"That will work."

Jethro got situated and Ziva got some lotion out of her bag and teasingly let it drizzle on his back.

"Hey, that's cold!"

Ziva just laughed. "Sorry, I couldn't resist. I'll make it up to you."

"I'll remember that some night when you want a back rub."

Ziva kissed him on the neck and then got busy massaging his tight muscles. Twenty minutes later Jethro was as relaxed as he had been in many days. He laid back down and Ziva went into the bathroom to put on some loose pajama bottoms and a tee shirt. When she came back Jethro had made room for her on the bed.

"Do you want a shirt on?"

"No."

His voice was quiet and his eyes were locked on hers as she moved onto the bed. Ziva settled on her side, her head propped in one hand while her other hand gently caressed his chest. His bruises were fading and the surgery site was healing very nicely. Ziva had always loved having her hands on her husband and after going for so long without being able to touch him as she wanted to she couldn't get enough of him tonight.

Jethro turned his head and Ziva captured his lips in a series of quick, open mouthed kisses that finally ended in a nice long, breath stealing kiss that Gibbs took control of. He pulled her over until she was lying almost fully on him, her right leg between his legs and her right hand gripping his left bicep. When they broke off the kiss Ziva kissed her way down his throat until he could catch his breath then she went right back to his mouth. It had been much too long for both of them and neither of them could get enough. Ziva felt Jethro's arousal against her thigh and smiled as she broke away from his kiss.

Ziva looked in her husband's eyes and saw his desire looking back. Never breaking eye contact with him she trailed her hand down his side, scraping gently with her nails until she reached the waistband of his pants. She raised an eyebrow in question and he just grinned at her. Ziva shifted just enough to move off him so she could get her hand down the front of his pants. She was happy to find Jethro's earlier concerns were, at least so far, unfounded.

When her hand wrapped around his erection, Jethro sucked in his breath, "Ahhh, god, Zee!"

"Yes? May I continue?" The laughter in her voice matched the happy look on her face.

"Yes, please."

"Tell me what you want Jethro."

With his wife stroking his cock and kissing his chest Jethro found it difficult to think straight but some how he managed to ask, "Is a nurse going to come busting in that door?"

Ziva looked up at him and said, "No, I have taken care of that for the night. So, tell me, what do you want?"

"Hell, you know what I like Zee. Don't ask me to make any more decisions tonight."

"Okay."

And with that Ziva got busy. She did indeed know what he liked and happily for her, she liked giving it to him. She took him to the proverbial edge and backed off and when she got him back there a second time she paused only long enough to shed her clothes. In the back of her mind she prayed a little prayer no one missed the Do Not Disturb sign. When she felt Jethro on the brink she settled on top of him and took him inside herself. She was mindful of his bad knee but that didn't slow them down much. They tried to keep the noise to a minimum considering their location.

Ziva moved carefully at first letting Jethro take control of the pace. They had made love in some interesting places during their time together and this was going to rank up there with the most interesting considering the risk they ran of someone walking in on them. Every time Ziva wanted to cry out she kissed Jethro instead.

As she felt them approaching orgasm, a time when Jethro was normally pretty loud, she clamped her hand over his mouth and whispered in his ear, "If you holler you know someone will come in here to see what's wrong."

Since he was in no way able to speak, Jethro just nodded. Ziva moved her hand and replaced it with her mouth just in time. As they recovered, Jethro looked at his wife and they both broke out laughing.

"That was fun, Zee. I love you, babe."

"Fun? Yeah it was fun. I love you." Ziva gently traced her fingers over his face and followed with gentle kisses. She was afraid that she was ruining their special time but her emotions were finally overwhelming her. "I never want to be away from you again. I was so scared, Jethro. I thought I'd lose my mind."

"I know. I don't want to be away either. I meant it when I said you are the reason I'm alive. All I thought about was taking the next breath. I knew if I could just get home I'd be alright because you would be there."

Ziva fell asleep quickly but Jethro lay awake for a long time processing everything that had happened to him in the last three weeks. That night was the beginning of the second stage of Jethro's healing. His body was already well on the way to recovering and now, with his wife in his arms he at last felt like his mind was too. He knew he still had a ways to go before he was really going to be able to put Mr. Fuller behind him but he was finally confident he could do it. He looked down at Ziva sleeping peacefully in his arms and he was sure they were going to be okay.

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Thirteen

Just as Jethro had predicted, he went home from the hospital the day after he and Ziva "reconnected". He had come home many times from extended periods away but he couldn't remember any that felt better than this one. Maybe because he had been certain at some points that he wasn't going to see his home again. Whatever the reason, he was very happy to hobble in his own front door.

His arm was still in a cast but luckily only to his elbow. Most of his bruises were faded and his cuts and burns were well on their way to being healed. He had a number of new scars but nothing he couldn't live with. The only thing keeping him from going back to work was his knee. He would be in a brace for another two weeks and would start physical therapy week after next to get the knee back in working order. He hoped to be cleared for at least desk duty in two weeks. Staying at home with little or nothing to do was going to drive him crazy. Once they were settled in the house, Ziva fixed them some lunch and they sat on the back deck enjoying the warm weather.

"I was thinking maybe you would like to go to the cabin for a week or so. It might be better than being stuck here at home. What do you think?"

"Can you get the time off?"

"Yes, I need to finish out this week but I could certainly be gone next week. Under the circumstances I doubt anyone would object anyway but I have the time. There are no projects that will need my attention until the week after next. I was only to be on call for fill ins next week anyway."

"I'd love it. We could do some fishing and you could give that new camera a workout. Let's do it."

"Wonderful. I will make the arrangements at work tomorrow. I am very happy to have you home Jethro."

"I'm happy to be here. Could you get me a phone? I want to talk to DiNozzo and I probably need to call Leon as well."

"Sure." Ziva went in the house and got Jethro the phone then said, "I'm going in and do the laundry and organize some things. Do you want to go through the mail?"

"Yeah I can do that after I call DiNozzo."

She handed him the phone and a stack of mail and kissed him before turning to go back into the house. Jethro spoke to Director Vance first and updated him on his situation. He explained he would have to be gone for two more weeks and said he could be available by phone if needed.

"I appreciate that Gibbs. DiNozzo is doing a good job in your absence but we'll be glad to have you back. Take your time."

"Thanks Leon. I'll be in touch."

Then he called Tony and asked for an update on Mr. Fuller and his two thugs.

"The two guys working for him both gave us statements and accepted a plea deal. They will be gone for a very long time, Boss. Mr. Fuller is stalling. I guess he thinks he'll get a better deal if he waits. I think the prosecutor wants to talk to you. Not sure what that's about."

"Have him call me. Can you get Fuller to the Navy Yard later this week? I want to talk to him."

"Sure Boss. How about Friday morning about nine o'clock?"

"That'll work."

"How you doin' Boss?"

"I'm fine. Just gotta let the knee heal up. Ziva and I are going to the cabin next week. I'll see you on Friday."

"Okay Boss, take it easy."

Jethro sat in the backyard for a long time thinking. He wanted to confront Mr. Fuller and look him in the eyes. He knew it might not make any difference but he still knew he had to do it. The man had caused him a world of hurt but Jethro understood better than most that Mr. Fuller had suffered as well. He certainly didn't excuse what had been done to him and he didn't want the man to go free but he still wanted to talk to him. He wasn't sure what he wanted to accomplish but it was something he had to do.

There were some other things he wondered about. He knew Ziva's father had a team of Mossad operatives and officers looking for the men who took him. He wondered why they didn't find him. The more he thought about all the information Ziva had given them, the tapes especially, he wondered why they hadn't been able to track them. He intended to ask about that some day soon but he didn't want to upset the delicate balance he and Ziva had achieved in the hospital. He still had a lot of things in his head he wasn't comfortable with and he wasn't sure how to fix that.

He also wondered where Ziva had been that night when he got home. He knew she had left the Navy Yard at least twenty minutes before he had. He was sure she had told him she was going home but she wasn't there when he got home and he had made two stops on the way. She had had plenty of time to get home. It wasn't that he didn't trust her or anything like that and part of him was glad she hadn't been there because she might have been hurt or even killed if she had tried to interfere. Which she surely would have done. Still, he wondered where she had been. He told himself it was probably something simple; maybe she stopped at the grocery store or the cleaners on the way home. He decided he would ask her about it while they were at the cabin next week.

While Jethro sat in the backyard thinking Ziva was doing laundry and changing the sheets on their bed. She busied herself with mindless household tasks but that didn't keep her mind from racing around worrying about her husband. She knew Jethro was still brooding about a lot of things and she wondered when he would blow up. She knew eventually he would. It was one of the things she had come to accept about him even though she worried it wasn't very healthy. He rarely blew up at her but she had a feeling he was going to this time. He hadn't asked about her looking for him yet but she was certain he wondered. Even though he had said he didn't blame her for anything she doubted he would feel the same way when he learned how close Ben's men had been to finding him.

She also knew that DiNozzo was aware of how close they had been. After Tony was sure his boss was going to be alright he had focused on the men responsible for Gibbs' suffering. He was allowed to interview the men at the Mossad safe house. The two henchmen told Tony where they had kept Gibbs and he and McGee had gone there to process what was left of the house. They took samples from the posts and shackles they found outside for DNA testing but didn't find much left of the house itself. After talking to the men who had tracked the kidnappers they figured out the cabin was only two miles from where they stopped trailing the men.

When Ziva learned that, she began questioning herself all over again. How could she have not sent them in after the men? Why did she listen to her father instead of to her own gut? What amount of suffering did Jethro endure because she was too afraid to let the Mossad agents go after his kidnappers.? All these questions had haunted her for the last week. She wondered what Tony was thinking and she feared what Jethro would think. She had convinced Tony to let her talk to Jethro about it instead of him hearing it from Tony. She knew this was a conversation they needed to have or it would blow up in their faces later or become such a barrier in their lives it could destroy them.

Jethro was reminded that night that just being out of bed and moving around even the little he had since he got home tired him out. He knew from experience that being in the hospital for as long as he had had taken a lot out of him. As always he was unhappy with his general lack of stamina. He wanted to get back to his old self RIGHT NOW, not in two or three weeks. And, he wanted to get in his basement but Ziva was adamant he wait at least a few days. He didn't really have the energy to argue with her so he let that go. Maybe while she was at work he'd sneak down for a while.

They ate an early supper and Jethro managed to get up the stairs by himself. He was standing in the bathroom staring at himself in the mirror when Ziva walked in the bedroom a few minutes later and saw him through the connecting doorway.

"Jethro, are you alright?"

"Yeah."

"Do you need help with anything?"

"No."

He didn't move; he just stood there looking in the mirror. Ziva walked to the doorway and waited. She wanted to reach out to him but for some reason she hesitated. That made her angry. Angry at herself and at the bastards that had caused this situation. Finally, she couldn't stand it any longer. She stepped in behind Jethro and carefully ran her hands across his shoulders. When he didn't move she continued touching him and finally leaned in and kissed him on the shoulder.

"Do you need to talk about it?"

"Probably but I don't want to."

She kept her hands on him and he seemed to relax into her touch. She wrapped her arms around his chest and leaned her head against his back.

"I love you."

"I know."

"Tell me what I can do, Jethro."

"I was going to take a shower but I just couldn't get in there. Pretty stupid huh?"

"No. Would it help if I joined you?"

Jethro turned around so he could face her. He took her face in his hands and kissed her. He loved her so much and he hated himself for being weak.

"Yeah, that would probably help a lot."

Ziva covered his cast with a plastic bag and they stepped into the shower together. Standing under the hot spray felt good but Jethro found himself fighting very unpleasant memories. Ziva could tell he was tense. She squeezed some shower gel into the scrubber and proceeded to gently run it and her free hand over his chest and abdomen being careful of his new wounds. Jethro never spoke but he kept his eyes on her and she could tell he was fighting the memories. She washed his back and legs and then shampooed his hair. Then she simply stood against him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Are you okay?"

"No, but there's nothing you can do to fix it. Except what you're already doing."

They stood under the warm water until it began to cool. Jethro loosened his grip and stepped away from her. He leaned down and kissed her hard on the mouth then stepped out of the shower. Ziva quickly washed herself and got out. Jethro was in the bedroom with a towel around his waist looking for pair of boxers. As she dried off she watched him pull them on, get a tee shirt on and then hobble to the bed. He looked very tired and vulnerable. That was not what she expected and certainly not want she wanted to see. Ziva realized in that moment that they had a harder road ahead than she had thought.

Ziva got ready for bed and slipped in on her side and lay facing Jethro. She reached out for him and he caught her hand lacing their fingers together. He leaned down and kissed her hungrily. He pulled her onto his chest and held her tightly. Running his hand through her hair he spoke so quietly she could hardly hear him.

"I need you to be patient, Zee. I love you. I don't want to hurt you but I probably will before all this is behind us."

Ziva rested her ear over his heart and let her hand trail up and down his side.

"I will be patient. I love you and I will do anything for you." She raised her head and looked him in the eyes. "Do you believe me?"

"Yes."

About four hours later Ziva, who had rolled off Jethro and was snuggled into his side, was awakened by him thrashing about in the bed and mumbling. He was very agitated and getting more so by the moment. She captured his hand to keep from getting hit and sitting up, she began talking to him quietly and gently rubbing his chest. After a few moments he calmed down but he did not wake up. Ziva settled back down but kept touching him and talking to him for a long time until she fell back to sleep herself. As nightmares and sleep disturbances went this was mild for Jethro. She hoped if he had more they would stay this way.

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: I thought I'd give you a treat (at least I hope you see it as such) and post a second chapter tonight. Thank you for all the reveiws. I appreciate each one.

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Fourteen

The next morning Gibbs had no recollection of the nightmare or at least he didn't mention it. Ziva got ready to go to work and before she left they shared coffee and toast in the kitchen. Jethro was looking forward to having a day alone in the house. He hoped he could get some of the garbage that was cluttering his mind dealt with while he had the house to himself. And, he planned to spend some time in the basement.

"I have to get going. Stay out of basement. I don't want to come home and find you in a heap on the floor because you have fallen down the stairs."

"Have you ever seen me fall down the stairs, Ziva?"

"No but….oh never mind. You will be down there before I get to the corner no matter what I say. Just take your phone in case you have a problem. I'll see you tonight. I love you."

"I love you more. Have fun today."

"Right."

Ziva drove off hoping her husband didn't overdo it considering this was his first day out of the hospital. She had been gone only about five minutes when her phone beeped at her. It was Jethro.

"Miss me already?"

"Yes. I called to say I made it safely to the basement." Then he closed the phone and smiled knowing she was smiling too.

Ziva stayed busy at work and tried not to think too much about the previous evening and night. She was worried about Jethro and knew he needed to talk to someone but she also knew he probably wouldn't. Maybe Ducky but most likely not. Then she realized maybe she could benefit from a session with their favorite medical examiner. She called and arranged to meet him for lunch.

At home, Jethro sat in the basement and looked at his latest boat. He didn't really want to work on her but it felt good to be down there with the sawdust and the smell of new wood. He eventually stretched out on the old couch and fell asleep.

Ziva and Ducky met for lunch and she filled him in on Jethro's condition. She told him about the shower problem and the nightmare.

"You will just have to let him work this out my dear. Jethro will not talk to anyone officially and most likely not even to me about these things. You have the best chance of getting him to open up but you will have to allow it to be on his schedule. And yes, he will probably say some things in the process of his working it out that will be hurtful. Keep in mind that he does love you very much. And just as importantly, he trusts you. Be patient and give him all the love you can."

"I will Ducky. He has already warned me he will hurt me. I will not let it affect us. We are going to the cabin next week and I hope we can sort out some of the issues there. Thank you for listening to me."

The afternoon drug by until finally Ziva could go home. She found Jethro in the kitchen fixing supper.

"I could get used to this. Coming home and finding my sexy husband cooking. A nice way to end the day."

"Well, don't get used to it. I just thought it would be nice if you didn't have to cook but it's only spaghetti. How was work?"

"Okay. Nothing major going on. I think Tony is getting bored and almost hoping for a case. My project is completed so we are free to go to the cabin Friday or Saturday whichever you want."

"I can get everything ready during the day Friday and we could leave right after you get home."

They had supper and after the kitchen was cleaned up they watched a movie and then went to bed. Jethro never spoke about anything that was bothering him. Ziva could tell he was thinking and sorting and brooding but she didn't push him to talk about it. That was actually one of the strengths of their relationship; she knew when to probe and when to be patient. Now was definitely not the time to probe and prod her husband. The silence didn't bother her as much as the thought that he was building walls around his emotions. That would not work and was not something she would be able to tolerate for long. Ziva was counting on their time in the mountains to work its magic and provide some healing for Jethro.

Friday morning while they were having coffee Jethro told Ziva he was going to be at NCIS to see Mr. Fuller at nine o'clock.

"Are you sure you want to do that?"

"I have to. I have to look him in the eye and let him know he didn't win."

"He knows that. You're alive."

"His intention was never to kill me. He just wanted me to suffer and then to spend the rest of my life thinking about him and looking over my shoulder. I need for him to see I'm not afraid of him."

"Will you come find me when you're finished?"

"Sure. Don't worry, Zee. I'll be fine."

"I know. But find me anyway."

Jethro arrived at the Navy Yard early so he could speak to the Director for a few minutes before seeing Mr. Fuller. He signed some paperwork related to his medical leave and discussed some matters relating to cases that had been in the works when he was kidnapped. Gibbs was pleased with the job Tony was doing with the team but was anxious to get back to work. He told Leon about his scheduled meeting with Mr. Fuller.

"See if you can convince him to take a deal. A trial could create some interesting problems for us."

"I understand. I gather you and Director David have been talking."

"Quite often lately. I don't fault Ziva for going to her father but having Mossad capture and then hold onto those guys is a bit tricky. We'll work it out though."

In a rare expression of doubt Gibbs said, "Maybe I should have just let Eli make them disappear."

"Maybe but I don't think so. You made the right decision Gibbs. We just have a little maneuvering to do. Don't worry about it. How are you feeling besides the knee?"

"Pretty good. Tired. Hopefully a week in the mountains will help. Thanks for everything, Leon. I'll see you."

Twenty minutes later Jethro stood in an observation room looking at Mr. Fuller through the one way glass. Fuller looked to be about Jethro's age. He was six feet tall, slender with black hair going gray and a narrow face and glasses. He hadn't shaved in several days and there were dark circles under his eyes. All in all he didn't look very intimidating. He was not what Jethro had pictured. Taking some deep breaths Jethro left the observation room and went into the hall. Tony was standing outside the interrogation room where Mr. Fuller was waiting.

Tony looked at his boss and even though he'd worked for Gibbs for many years and been all kinds of circumstances with him, he didn't recognize the look in Gibbs' eyes.

"You ready Boss?"

"Yeah."

"I'll be right here. Just holler if you need me."

"Thanks Tony."

Jethro gripped the doorknob and hesitated just a second before opening the door and walking in to face the man who had almost had him killed. Fuller had not been told why he was there so when he looked up and saw Gibbs standing over him he was shocked. He tensed and backed away from the table but didn't get out of his chair.

"Relax Mr. Fuller. I'm not going to hurt you."

"Why am I here?"

"Because I wanted to see the man who almost killed me. Do you blame me?"

Fuller didn't respond. He just looked at Gibbs with hatred and a small bit of fear. The fact that he had failed to get away with his plan bothered him a lot. He wished now that he had just killed Gibbs and been done with it. He feared prison and knew he was going to be there for the rest of his life.

Jethro was used to sitting in this room with suspects and staring them into confessions. It didn't bother him that Mr. Fuller was silent. He studied the man and while he was doing so he began to let go of some of his fear and his desire for a measure of revenge. When he finally spoke he surprised himself and Mr. Fuller.

"I'm sorry about your family."

Fuller was so stunned he thought he must have heard incorrectly. "What?"

"I said I'm sorry about what happened to your family. I know what it means to lose your family."

"What do you want Agent Gibbs?"

Jethro leaned back in his chair and relaxed. "I'm not sure. To see you. To let you know you didn't win. That's about it I guess."

"I don't understand."

"I'm sure you don't." Jethro stood up to leave. As he reached the door he turned around and faced Mr. Fuller for the last time. "Take the deal, Fuller. Those men who caught you don't want to get involved in a trial. You get my drift?"

Gibbs didn't wait for an answer. He stepped into the hall and found Ziva had taken Tony's place by the door.

"Hey."

His voice was more than a little bit shaky. Ziva stepped into him and he wrapped his arms around her pulling her against his body. He was obviously upset by the encounter so Ziva began talking to him quietly and rubbing his back.

"It's alright. It's over, Jethro. Let it go."

Jethro stood in the hall for a long time holding her and letting her calm him down. It felt so good to have her in his arms he never wanted to let go. He felt like he had finally done something in his own defense. As if he had finally hit back at the man who had tried to kill him.

"Thank you for being here. I don't think hugging DiNozzo would have been nearly as good."

"I should hope not!"

She popped him lightly on the arm and kissed him. Together they went to autopsy to see Ducky and tell him about the meeting. Later they all went to lunch then Jethro went home to get things ready for the trip to the cabin. As was his habit these days he also took a nap. When Ziva got home from work their bags and supplies were packed in the truck and Jethro was asleep on the couch. But not peacefully sleeping; he was thrashing about and mumbling much as he had been in bed two nights before.

Ziva made some noise hoping to wake him but when that didn't work she went to the couch and sat beside her husband. She held his right hand down and spoke to him in an attempt to awaken him from the nightmare.

"Jethro! Wake up. It's alright I am right here with you. Wake up."

Jethro stopped moving around and slowly opened his eyes. He was sweaty and tense and looked at her with a guarded expression.

"What happened?"

"You were having a bad dream I think. You are alright now."

Ziva leaned down and kissed him and Jethro pulled her onto the couch with him. The kiss became heated and before she knew it Jethro had her pinned beneath him and was pulling her pants down. Ziva was reaching for the button on his pants when he caught her hands and pinned them over her head. He reached down with one hand, freed himself from his pants and thrust into her without warning. Ziva cried out in surprise but he didn't seem to notice. Fighting to catch up with him Ziva pulled her hands free and tried to get her husband to focus on her by touching his face and pulling him down to kiss her. He was thrusting into her with a ferocity she had never felt from him before.

"Jethro! Jethro, look at me!"

He finally opened his eyes and looked at her and then he stilled his motion and blinked as if he had no idea what was going on. Ziva gently ran her fingers over his face and then kissed him softly on the mouth. He pulled out of her but when he tried to move off her she stopped him.

"Don't. Just slow down a bit. Let me catch up with you."

"Oh god, did I hurt you? I'm sorry, Ziver." He hung his head down on her forehead.

"No, you did not hurt me. You just surprised me is all. Come here and kiss me."

Jethro leaned down and kissed her, slow and deep, clinging to her mouth. She reached down between their sweat slick bodies and stroked him. She brought him back to her center and took him inside herself. Then she began to move, arching up toward him, letting him know she was ready for him.

"Now, Jethro."

He began slowly and carefully moving in her. Before long they found their rhythm and what had started as a need to drive away pain and fear became an act of love and healing. When it was over they held onto each other for a long time before they got up and got dressed to leave. They didn't speak about it until they were in the truck and on their way out of town. Jethro reached across the seat for her hand. Ziva laced her fingers with his as best she could with his cast in the way.

"I'm sorry if I hurt you Ziva."

"You did not hurt me. But what happened? It seemed you did not know what you were doing."

"I don't know. I think I must have had a nightmare and when you woke me up I just reacted. You know I would never force myself on you Zee. I love you too much to ever hurt you like that."

"I know that, Jethro. That is NOT what I thought was happening. Anyway, it certainly turned out nicely. Did it not?"

"I'd say so. But I don't want to do something like that again. It felt out of control."

"I understand. I think it is just another episode we will put behind us as we move forward. I am sure seeing Mr. Fuller today stirred up a lot of emotions for you. Do you want to talk about your time with him?"

"I was only in there for about five minutes I think. I didn't really have anything to say to him after I told him I was sorry about his family. He didn't understand why I was there. Guess I can't blame him for that."

"You told him you were sorry about his family? That must have surprised him."

"It did. Kinda surprised me too. He didn't look like I thought he would. You know, I had a monster pictured and he just looks like a tired, middle-aged guy who has lost everything and knows he's going to prison."

"He should have thought about that before he took you. I have very little sympathy for the man. I know he lost his family but that doesn't give him the right to take mine away from me."

Jethro glanced over at her and smiled. "No one is going to take me away from you ever again. You're stuck with me Zee."

"That is just exactly how I want it."

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Fifteen

They arrived at the cabin well after dark and by the time they had unpacked and organized things Jethro was exhausted. When Ziva came out of the bathroom she found him sprawled out on the bed fully clothed. She pulled off his shoes, socks and pants and he took off his shirt and they crawled under the covers together. Ziva rolled onto her side and Jethro spooned her from behind. With his arm draped over her he fell asleep in seconds. Ziva kissed his palm and then allowed sleep to pull her under as well.

The first couple of days they slept late which for them meant seven o'clock. Ziva went for a run in the mornings and Jethro fixed breakfast. He had stopped running years ago after his first knee surgery and he had to admit he didn't miss it. They spent their days reading, fishing and generally being lazy. It was hard for Jethro to do nothing when he was at home but for some reason it didn't bother him when he was at the cabin. He could sit on the fishing dock for hours just looking at the water and the forest beyond. Ziva had a new camera with a couple of high powered lens so she spent a few hours every day wandering in the woods looking for interesting photo subjects. Unbeknownst to her husband she was also using those lens to shoot lots of photos of him relaxing outside, lying in the sun and repainting their deck chairs.

Jethro was still quiet and obviously still had some things on his mind but Ziva was determined to wait him out. Her patience was finally rewarded on Tuesday night.

They were sitting on the porch looking up at the stars when he reached for her hand and said, "Tell me about going to your father for help."

She had known it was coming. Had hoped against hope that he would not ask. Now she took a deep breath and tried to think of exactly how much to tell him. As soon as she let out the breath she realized it was pointless to wonder that. She had to tell him the whole thing. He was Gibbs after all. For all she knew he already knew the answers. Besides all that she loved him too much to keep anything from him. Ziva pulled her chair around so she was facing him.

"After I got the first video I was afraid you would not survive two weeks of what they had already done in five days. I went to the embassy, careful not to be followed and used the secure entrance. I told my father what had happened, showed him the video and he tasked Benjamin with finding you."

Ziva went on to tell him about the yard light videos, the agents following the gray car and all the work Benjamin and his men did to try to locate him. She told him about the agents scattered around the neighborhood. He laughed about their neighbors having Mossad operatives hiding in their living rooms, looking out their windows. Ziva had to concede that no doubt made for some interesting gossip when it was all over. She told him about finding him in the driveway.

"Did they ever find where Fuller was keeping me?"

"No, they tracked the men to Warrenton but no further. Tony interrogated the men at the safe house and they told him where they had kept you. They burned the house down before they left. Tony and McGee went there; nothing was left of the house."

Jethro looked at her waiting for her to go on. She had turned away from him now and was staring out into the night. Somehow he knew she had more to tell him. What it was he had no idea but he knew there was something eating at her just as there were things about this ordeal that still bothered and ate at him. The last secret Ziva had been able to keep from him was that she loved him. Once she let loose of that secret she had been an open book to him.

"Ziver?"

When she looked back at him he could see the tears shining in her eyes.

"They were only two miles from you Jethro. Two miles. Three days before you came home. I'm sorry Jethro. So damned sorry."

She was crying now, tears streaming down her face. She covered her face with her hands and sobbed. She felt so guilty for not finding him. So guilty about the pain he suffered those last three days. She didn't think she would ever forgive herself for not finding him. She got up and walked to the edge of the porch and stared out into the darkness.

While she cried Jethro closed his eyes and processed what she had said. Two miles? Three days? That meant he could have been spared the broken arm, the broken jaw and the blown knee. He couldn't believe it. Two miles? What stopped them? He tried to imagine himself in Ziva's position but when he did he was certain he would have found a way to go those last two miles. These guys were Mossad after all not the local scout troop. They were trained to sneak up on people and eliminate them before they knew what hit them.

Jethro got up and walked into the night. He was angry and hurt and confused. He couldn't figure out why they didn't come for him. He walked about fifty yards, to the edge of the woods, leaned against a tree and tried to get himself under control. He wanted to hit something but he couldn't really considering his cast and his still sore left hand. Instead he yelled out his frustration. Why had Ziva decided to wait? What the hell was she thinking? Didn't she know what was happening to him? Finally, he couldn't control his emotions any longer. He just couldn't stop thinking about how much pain and fear those bastards had caused him in those last three days. He sat down, leaned against the tree and cried

When Jethro walked off the porch Ziva started to go after him but realized that would not be a good idea. She thought he was probably very angry and she didn't blame him. She was angry too and the only person she had to blame was herself. She was right back to thinking about what she could have spared him if only she had had the courage to make a different decision. Over the last week she had tried and tried to justify her decision but she just couldn't do it. She had been wrong and it had cost Jethro a lot. Now she had to face that and hope his love for her would allow him to forgive her.

She stood at the edge of the porch and looked out to where she was sure Jethro had gone. She had heard him yelling and even though it was dark she was pretty sure she knew where he was. She could just make out his shirt against a tree at the edge of the woods. She listened carefully and thought she heard him crying. That brought her tears back. Ziva knew she had to get herself together so she could help Jethro if he would let her. She decided she would give him a few more minutes then she was going after him. She was through waiting.

Jethro slowly got himself under control. He couldn't remember the last time he had cried like that. He knew Ziva would be worried about him and he hoped she would have the sense to give him some time alone. He took some deep breaths and tried to clear his head. He asked himself who he was really upset with and when Ziva was the answer he stood up and kicked the nearest thing that wasn't a tree trunk. What the hell was he going to do about that? Jethro paced around in the dark talking to himself and trying to work out his feelings. Yes, he was angry they had been so close but didn't find him. He was angry when he thought about that last morning. He tried to blame Ziva for all that pain and anguish but he just couldn't do it. He loved her too much to let her have that responsibility.

That was when he decided he had to let it go. Whatever she had done she must have thought it was the right thing or she would have done something else. He knew she would have carefully considered her options and chosen the one she felt gave him the best chance of survival. She must have thought the risk was too great. And maybe she had been right. After all, he was alive. He had survived. She had ultimately been right and he realized he needed to tell her so.

Jethro walked back toward the cabin and Ziva met him on the porch. Without hesitation he wrapped her in his arms and held on to her like she was his last bottle of bourbon. He felt her shaking in his arms and knew she was crying again. Jethro smoothed his hand down her back and tried to comfort her.

"Ssshh, Zee it's okay. Please don't cry. Everything is alright."

"How can it be? I left you there Jethro. I made the wrong choice!"

"Did you? I don't think so. I'm here aren't I? I survived which is what you were counting on right?"

Ziva leaned back from him and roughly brushed the last of her tears away. She looked at him and saw only love and trust in his eyes. She reflected that it would be unfair to him to say she was surprised but in a small way she was.

"But I waited when I could have sent Ben's men in for you."

"Yeah and they might have found me but they might also have set off an alarm or been seen or any number of other things. I can guarantee you if Fuller had seen anyone there looking for me I'd be dead now. Did you know how many men were in the house or if there was a perimeter alarm or lookouts?"

"No. We didn't know any of that."

"Okay, it would have taken at least two days to do the proper recon of the house and that leaves one day you might have spared me. Or you could have gotten me killed. I trained you better than that. Obviously. You made the right choice, Ziva. I'm here. I'm okay. Stop questioning yourself. If I have to make that an order I will."

"You are forgiving me for not finding you?"

"As I told you in the hospital, there is nothing for me to forgive where you are concerned."

"Oh Jethro, I didn't know what to do. I asked my father and he said he thought I should wait. He was afraid if his men were seen the man would kill you. I let him guide me."

"He gave you the right advice. Besides it's over now. I'm going to be okay. We will be okay. I want you to forgive yourself. Promise me."

"I will but only if you kiss me now and tell me how much you love me and promise you will never let me go."

"That won't be a problem. Come here."

Things began to get better after that conversation. They made love that night and it was sweet and gentle and everything they needed it to be. Ziva went to sleep feeling as if a huge weight had been lifted from her heart. She finally believed they were going to get back to where they had been before Mr. Fuller exploded into their lives. Jethro fell asleep wrapped in his wife's arms with only one question left to ask. Where was Ziva when he got home that night? He wasn't sure why that mattered but something was picking at his brain and he needed to know.

On Wednesday they spent the entire day fishing and lounging around the lake. They had a picnic lunch and made love on a blanket in the sun. Jethro was feeling better every day. He was getting his strength back and his knee was much less painful. Ziva felt at peace. She was happy to see her husband feeling better and she trusted in their love for each to see them through whatever else came out of this horrible ordeal. Jethro seemed more settled and had not had a nightmare for the last two nights.

Thursday it rained a good deal of the day so they stayed in the cabin reading and napping the day away. Friday morning dawned clear and warm and they enjoyed their coffee on the porch. They were going home that night so they would have a couple of days at home before Ziva went back to work and Jethro started physical therapy. Ziva had made cinnamon rolls for breakfast and while she was getting them out of the oven Jethro poured them a second cup of coffee and carried it to the porch. He was going to ask her the last thing that was bugging him about the kidnapping. Ziva set down the tray holding the cinnamon rolls and passed Jethro a plate.

"These look great Zee. Thanks."

"You are welcome. We have not had these in a long time and I thought we deserved a treat."

Just as he was about to ask her why she wasn't home when he got there the house phone rang. They looked at each other surprised at the interruption. No one ever called them when they were there. In fact, very few people had the number; it was mostly for calling out in case of an emergency. Ziva went in the kitchen and answered.

"Hello."

"Ziva, I'm sorry to bother you. May I speak to Jethro please?"

"Of course."

She handed the phone to Jethro saying, "Ducky."

"Hey Duck. What's wrong?"

"I thought you would want to know, Jethro, Mr. Fuller killed himself late last night."

"Wow. What happened?"

"Hanged himself. No doubt about it being a suicide. He left a note. Addressed to you. I'll show it to you when you come back."

"What'd it say?"

"He apologized to you. Said he lost his mind after his son killed himself. There is a lot of rambling but that is the gist of the letter."

"Okay. Thanks Duck."

"You're welcome. Goodbye Jethro."

Ziva was watching him as he disconnected the call and put the phone down. "Fuller hanged himself last night. Left a note for me apologizing."

"My goodness. I cannot say I am sorry he is dead."

"Yeah, me either. Not surprised I guess. Probably didn't like the idea of spending the rest of his life in prison."

"That pretty much brings this whole tragic tale to an end I suppose."

"Yeah."

They finished breakfast in silence both of them lost in their own thoughts. Ziva was very happy Mr. Fuller was gone out of their lives forever. She hoped her husband would now be able to put his terrible ordeal behind him sooner rather than later. The death of his tormentor wouldn't necessarily take away Jethro's memories but she hoped it would help somehow. Jethro had to admit to himself he wasn't sorry Fuller was dead. It was going to be a lot easier for him to let go of everything knowing there would be no trial and not having to think about Fuller ever again. He had to admit he was glad the guy was gone.

TBC


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews and alerts.

Just Keep Breathing

Chapter Sixteen

Ziva cleared away the breakfast dishes and cleaned up the kitchen. When she returned to the porch she asked Jethro what he wanted to do with the rest of their day.

"I think I'd like to go fishing for a while. Do you mind?"

"Of course not. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just need to sort some stuff out. I can't seem to shake this….whatever it is that's got me all twisted up. Can you understand?"

Ziva leaned down and kissed him. She ached for him; she had never seen him so unsure of things or so confused about himself.

"Yes, I do understand. Please don't shut me out, Jethro. I know you need your alone time and I am fine with that but you cannot shut me out. We are a team and we will get through this together"

Jethro stood up and took her face in his hands. He wanted to blink his eyes and have all the bad memories go away but it didn't work like that. He felt like he was getting better but sometimes he just lost focus and found himself back in that room with water pouring down on him or hanging by his wrists getting the hell beaten out of him. Maybe when his pain went away it would be easier for the memories to follow but right now he still hurt a good deal of the time and he was tired of that.

"I'm not shutting you out. Well, I guess I am a little but that's not what I'm trying to do. It's just that I can't get some of these things out of my head. I need to try and do that so I can move on. If I need to tell you about it I will but I don't want to do that. I love you. I don't mean to hurt you."

"I know that. Go on. Go drown some worms and I will get our things ready so we can leave this evening. I may take a walk and get a few more photos. Go on now. I love you."

Jethro sat on the dock for almost two hours without catching a single fish. He didn't care. He just wanted the peace and quiet of the lake to surround him so his mind could wander. He took off his shirt and soaked up the sun. He thought about Fuller being dead and said out loud that he was glad. Then he put that away and vowed not to think about it again. He thought about the two men who had beaten and tortured him. They were going to prison for life. He knew they were just hired hands and he had no desire to see them or know anything else about them. As far as he was concerned they were dead too.

He took stock of his physical condition. His arm would be fine. He would have some work to do to get it back in shape and get his shooting back to where it needed to be. The knee the same. A lot of work there too but he wasn't afraid of work. He'd rehabbed a knee before and he knew he could do it again. His jaw was okay. He would just have to be careful not to get hit there again. The cuts and burns were healed. He had several new scars but he didn't care about them. Frank had told him he was healing just fine inside including his ribs. He still had a lot of pain though and Frank said that was to be expected. He had pills he could take but he didn't like to. It seemed a weakness to him and he fought against it.

Satisfied with his physical condition he next turned his thoughts to his mental state. He was still having some nightmares but not as often and not as bad. He didn't flinch when a door opened anymore and he was able to shower by himself again even though he preferred Ziva to be in there with him. Smiling to himself he admitted that had been the case for a long time; it wasn't a result of being taken. He wondered why he still felt shaky sometimes. Then he realized he had had to really work to come up with a word to describe how he felt. He thought about that for a while and it occurred to him that he actually felt pretty good at that particular moment. Better in fact than he had in a while. Well, maybe Fuller being dead was helping. And, the week in the mountains with Ziva had been a big help. He made a mental note to be sure he let her know that. Satisfied with his soul searching, he put the fishing pole away and headed back to the cabin.

Ziva had packed their bags and taken the trash to the truck to be dumped in the dumpster at the end of the road. Their leftovers were in the cooler and everything was ready whenever they decided to get on the road. When Jethro came in Ziva was looking through some of her photos she'd downloaded onto the laptop. He sat down next to her on the couch and they looked at them together.

"These are really good, Zee. You have an eye for this stuff."

"Thank you. I think I would like to frame some of them for the den. What do you think?"

"Sure. The problem will be choosing which ones. There are a lot of great shots here."

"You seem to be feeling better. The fishing helped?"

Laughing he answered, "You mean the worm drowning? There are no fish in that damned lake if you ask me. But yes, I feel good. I got some stuff sorted out. One thing I want to say is this has been a really good week for me. Being here with you is the best medicine I could have had. I can't begin to tell you how much I love you and value you and need you."

Ziva was stunned. Jethro rarely said so much about feelings at one time. The look he was giving her said even more than his words which was quite a lot. She leaned into him and began kissing him with a need that he couldn't possibly miss. She moaned when he pushed her down on the couch and settled on top of her.

When he gave her a chance to breathe she managed to say, "Bed please. Not enough room here."

Grinning he got up and pulled her up and led the way to the bedroom. By the time they got there they had already shed most of their clothes. They slowed down and spent a lot of time touching and tasting each other and whispering and laughing together. Eventually the heat was back and they came together in that wonderful, sensual way that only lovers who really know and care about each other can do.

Ziva could never get enough physical contact with her husband. She loved the feel of him next to her, on top of her and of course inside her. She craved his touch and his smell and the taste of him. Lying with him after making love she was always grateful that he wanted her close. It would have killed her if he was the kind of man who just rolled over and went to sleep. There was very little chance of that happening. Jethro wanted Ziva close as much as she wanted him. He loved the feel of her skin and he never got tired of touching her and getting his fingers all tied up in her thick, curly hair. As far as he was concerned there was not a better feeling in the world than having his wife lying naked on top of him unless it was having his wife lying naked underneath him.

"We better get moving or the traffic will be awful."

"I know but I sure am enjoying lying here with you."

"The sooner we get up and get home the sooner you can do it again."

"Ziva you are a very beautiful and sexy and practical woman you know that?"

"I never tire of hearing you say so."

The drive home was much better than the drive up had been. They talked and laughed and Ziva sang along with the radio. It was just like it had been a month ago; they were happy together and nothing could get in the way of that.

That night as they were getting ready for bed Jethro remembered he wanted to ask Ziva about the night he was taken. While he sat on the bed and thought about how to approach that subject, Ziva was in their bathroom getting ready for bed. She reached to get a clean towel out of the cabinet and saw a bag there from the local drugstore. She gasped. She couldn't believe it. She was about to reach for the bag when she heard Jethro calling her.

"Did you say something, Jethro?"

"Yeah, I wanted to ask you something. Are you about done in there."

Ziva was still shaken by what she found in the cabinet. How could she have forgotten it? She pulled herself together and went to see what Jethro wanted. She crawled onto the bed and sat behind him rubbing his back.

"Where were you the night I was taken?"

Ziva was shocked. She stilled her hands and he turned around to look at her.

"I guess I just wasn't home yet. What the hell are you implying, Jethro?"

That was just the reaction he had hoped to avoid. But in fairness he knew it had been a bad question.

"I'm not implying anything. My god, Zee, that's not what I meant. I have been over that night so many times in my head. I just wondered why you weren't home yet that's all. You left at least twenty minutes before I did. Actually, I'm glad you weren't here. They might have killed you or hurt you at least. I'm sorry. I just wonder that's all."

He had tried his hardest to placate her and explain himself but he couldn't tell if it had worked or not. He honestly had no idea why this mattered to him but it did. Ziva just stared at him the whole time he was trying to explain. She could tell by the look on his face he was being honest with her but it still stung to hear him question her.

The fact was if he had asked her ten minutes ago she would not have had an answer. It was only because she had opened the bathroom cabinet that she had the answer now.

When she continued to just look at him with a kind of odd look on her face Jethro decided it wasn't important.

"Okay, just forget about it. I'm sorry I upset you. I can't even say why I wonder about it. Just trying to put all the pieces of that day together I guess. I'm sorry, Zee forget about it."

"No, I am happy to tell you. Just a minute."

She got off the bed and went back to the bathroom. Jethro was furious with himself. All the work they had done to get things straight and he had ruined it with his stupid questions. She had been so patient with him, never pushing and taking all his crap for the past two weeks and now he had screwed it all up. He wanted to hit something. Instead he just fell back on the bed and sighed, pretty sure he had ruined their night.

Ziva stood in the bathroom for a long few minutes and tried to understand how she could have forgotten something so very important. She had no reasonable explanation so she could only chalk it up to the stress and trauma of the past several weeks. That didn't really satisfy her but it was all she could come up with. She realized she had been in there a long time when she heard Jethro at the door.

"Zee, I'm sorry. Please come out and talk to me."

Ziva opened the door holding the plastic bag from Walgreens. She put her hands on his chest and pushed him back toward their bed. When he got there she pushed him down on the bed and then sat down beside him. She held up the bag.

"This is why I was late getting home. This and the traffic which was horrible because of a wreck. But this is the main reason."

"You went to the drugstore? Oh, well like I said I'm glad you weren't here. I didn't mean to upset you Ziver." He looked at her and she wasn't moving or giving him any indication he was forgiven. "Why are you looking at me like that? Are you mad at me for asking?"

"No I am not mad at you. I am upset with myself. Do you want to know what is in this bag?"

"I guess."

"Two pregnancy tests."

The expression on his face was absolutely priceless. Ziva wished she had her camera at that moment.

"You mean….you are….we are…."

"I bought them because I thought I was pregnant. I was going to take the tests and have the results waiting when you got home. If it was positive of course. If not I would have just thrown them away."

"So…what happened?

"What happened? You got kidnapped you idiot. I never took the stupid tests and in all the drama and so forth I forgot all about them. And somehow about the fact that I was sure I was pregnant."

"You keep talking in the past tense. So, you're not pregnant?"

"Yes, I believe I am. I have not taken the test to prove it but I am pretty sure."

"Why are you upset then? Don't you want to be pregnant?"

"I am upset at myself for forgetting all about it. What kind of woman forgets she might be pregnant?"

"The woman who has been dealing with her husband being kidnapped then returned to her practically dead. The woman who was at the hospital non stop for two weeks. The woman whose husband has been a royal pain in the ass ever since he woke up in the hospital."

Jethro stood up, took the bag from her and then pulled her up. He let her into the bathroom then opened the boxes and gave her the test sticks.

"I'll wait outside if you want."

"Oh no. You stay right here mister."

Jethro began pacing around in a circle. He wanted a child with Ziva more than he could say. They had been talking about having a baby for months and as much fun as he was having trying, he had begun to wonder if it was ever going to happen.

Ziva was not that anxious about the test because she was already fairly certain she was pregnant. She watched Jethro literally turning in circles and sent up a quick prayer that she was right. If the answer was no he was going to be very disappointed. In a way, Ziva was glad she had forgotten the tests. It would not have been nearly as much fun doing this with Jethro gone. At least this way they could share the excitement and joy. She looked at the clock and saw the time was up.

"Are you ready to look?"

"Hell yes."

Ziva held the test sticks out so he could look first. The expression on his face told her everything she needed to know.

END

Well, not really. There is an epilogue coming.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: Here is the final chapter of this story. Thanks to all my readers and especially all of you who alerted and/or reviewed this story. This was my first real Zibbs story and I like it so who knows I may try them again.

Just Keep Breathing

Epilogue

**Three months later**

"Ziva, I have to go. Are you coming or not?"

"Not."

He didn't like the sound of that. What the heck was wrong this morning? Jethro sighed and began climbing the stairs to their bedroom. His wife was sitting on their bed in her underwear. Damn.

"What's the matter, Zee?"

"I am fat!" Now she was crying. Double damn.

"Ziva, you are not fat. You are pregnant. You are carrying our child for god's sake. What's really the matter?"

She looked up at him and wiped her eyes. This was the third time this week she had been crying before they even left the house in the morning. Ziva was an emotional wreck and she didn't like it. She loved being pregnant. She was ecstatic to be having a child with Jethro but this whole hormone thing was making her crazy. She wondered how her mother had managed to have three children and not lose her mind.

Ziva took a deep breath and stood up. Jethro leaned down and kissed her and she instantly felt better.

"I know you don't believe this but you are more beautiful every day. I love you. Do you need help with anything?"

"No, I just need to find something I can squeeze your son or daughter into."

"Okay. But I need to go, they're waiting for me at the scene. I'll see you later."

"Alright. I am fine Jethro. See you at lunch?"

"I'll try."

When Jethro finally got to the scene of their latest murder, his team and Ducky were already hard at work. No one said anything; they just grinned at each other and went on working. The Boss had that harried look they were getting used to.

"Bad morning, Jethro?" Only Ducky had the temerity to ask such a question.

"Hormones. Crying. Doesn't know why. How long can that last Duck? And for god's sake don't say nine months."

"Well not usually. Hopefully things will even out by the fifth month."

"Thank goodness, that's any day now. Say a prayer."

Jethro turned his attention to his senior agent and asked, "What's the story DiNozzo?"

**Two months later**

Ziva and Jethro walked to their car carrying the latest sonogram picture of their unborn child. They were practically floating on air they were so happy and excited. Ziva was seven months pregnant and everything was perfect so far. Mother and baby were in excellent health and the pregnancy was progressing without a hitch. After several weeks of extreme mood swings Ziva was finally leveled out so the crying and stressing were things of the past. She was enjoying her pregnancy and could hardly wait to welcome their child into the world.

The happy father-to-be was completely recovered from being kidnapped and beaten nearly to death several months ago. All his injuries had healed and he was at full strength physically and emotionally. It had been a difficult recovery but when they found out they were expecting it made a huge difference in Jethro's mental state. Suddenly he had something joyful and alive to focus on instead of the horrible things that had been done to him. With Ziva's help he had long since processed the death of his first wife and daughter and was now completely at ease with welcoming a new baby into his life.

On the way to NCIS they stopped for lunch. Ziva's appetite was back with a vengeance and she had to remind herself to use some discretion. She craved chocolate shakes and ice cream; something she had rarely eaten prior to the pregnancy. Jethro had made several late night runs to the grocery store for ice cream to satisfy her urges.

Happily for Jethro the only other treat she craved was him. He had forgotten about pregnancy sex but was certainly glad to be reminded of it a few months ago. They had always had a healthy, satisfying and fun sex life and that had only gotten better when Ziva got pregnant. Jethro knew enough to take advantage of this happy time in his life because he also knew there would be a dry spell after the baby came. Sometimes he wondered if he was too old for the whole business of having an infant in the house but then he looked at his wife and knew it would be worth it even if he didn't sleep for weeks at a time.

He had finished painting the nursery the previous weekend and now all they needed was the furniture and a rocking chair. Some of the furniture was ordered and the rocking chair was in the basement lacking only a final coat of varnish. He was building a crib but it wouldn't be ready for a couple of months; plenty soon enough for the baby who would be in a bassinet for a month or so anyway.

Abby and Ziva had been shopping and there had been a baby shower last weekend so their child was well outfitted for at least its first several months of life. Since they had chosen not to find out the gender of the baby there were lots of greens, and pale blues and yellows accounted for in the many outfits already in the nursery. And lots of gift cards and diapers and bottles and on and on and on. Jethro didn't remember there being so many different things a baby needed but then it had been a long time ago that he was buying baby stuff. He loved watching Ziva fold and sort and refold the blankets and quilts and tiny outfits. He knew she was going to be a wonderful mother even if she had her doubts.

Ziva did have a few doubts about her maternal skills but one thing she knew for sure was that she loved the little one growing in her stomach. One look at her husband told her whatever she was going through whether the hormones raging or the ice cream cravings or the swollen feet, it was going to be worth it the moment she saw Jethro holding their child for the first time. She had been a little bit afraid when they got together that he would not want another child. After all he had been married three times after Shannon and never had another baby. They had spent a long, emotional Sunday afternoon talking about it during their first months together. In the end he was able to convince her he would welcome a child with her. Remembering the look on his face that day in the bathroom when she took the pregnancy test, Ziva knew he had been truthful. He was beyond happy.

**Two months later**

Ziva Gibbs was miserable. She couldn't get comfortable on the bed and had taken to sleeping on the couch where she could sit up and put her feet up at the same time. Jethro hated not having her in the bed but he understood her need for comfort was more important than his need to have her close. Right now she was standing in the kitchen staring into the fridge looking for something to eat. Nothing really sounded good but she was hungry. Finally she settled for some yogurt and glass of water.

Their baby was due in three days. As far as Ziva was concerned the little bugger was welcome to arrive early and the earlier the better. Her back hurt, her feet hurt and it seemed she had to go the bathroom every fifteen minutes. Today was Friday and Jethro was at work but he was on the phone to her so often she was sure he wasn't getting any work done.

As a matter of fact Jethro wasn't getting much work done. He was pacing around in MTAC waiting for a connection to his father-in-law in Tel Aviv. He had a surprise planned for Ziva and this was the final part of getting it done. Finally the screen came to life and he was looking at Eli David at his desk in Mossad headquarters.

"Shalom Jethro. How is my daughter?"

"Shalom Eli. She's fine. Miserable but fine. Any problems on your end?"

"No everything is good. Any problem there?"

"No, we're good to go. I have the numbers and I'll call you as soon as the baby is here."

"Very good. Thank you Jethro. I will call Ziva later as we planned."

"Alright. Shalom."

When he got home that night Ziva was asleep on the couch. He sat down and took her feet in his lap and began rubbing first one then the other. Ziva woke up of course but she never opened her eyes. She gave a soft moan of appreciation and thanked her lucky stars for letting her fall in love with such a wonderful man.

"That is the best thing you could have done for me Jethro. Thank you."

"You're welcome. How was your afternoon?"

"Fine. I think the phone must be broken. It didn't ring for almost three hours this afternoon."

"Very funny. We caught a case. I was busy."

"Too busy to check on your very pregnant wife?"

"Apparently."

"My father called. Maybe he knew you were busy. He says hello and reminded me to have you call him when the baby comes no matter the time."

"I'll remember. He's the first one on the list to be called."

Two days later while Jethro was having his morning coffee Ziva stepped into the kitchen and told him they needed to choose the baby's name. This had of course, been discussed many times over the past several months.

"We have to make a decision, Jethro. This baby will be here soon."

"We could wait until we see him or her and then decide. You know, see what they look like and pick a name that goes with their looks."

Ziva looked at him as if he had two heads. "Is that what you and Shannon did."

"Hell no. We had names picked out by the third month."

"Then what makes you think I'd want to wait until I saw the baby? Are you nuts?"

"As a matter of fact yes, I'm nuts about you. I thought we had already decided on these names." He pointed to a list of names taped on the cabinet door. All but two were crossed off.

"Are those still good for you?"

"Yes."

"Good because we need to go to the hospital now."

Jethro looked up from his coffee and swallowed. For the first time he noticed Ziva was breathing kinda hard.

"You sure?" Stupid question to ask a very pregnant, trained assassin.

"Yes. My water broke a few minutes ago while I was in the bathroom. I have been having some contractions for a while now. I think we need to go."

"Right. Okay. I'll get the bag."

"It is by the door. Here are the keys. Kiss me first."

He kissed her but he was reluctant to spend too much time on it while she was standing in their kitchen. "How about we get there and then I'll kiss you all you want?"

"Okay."

Once they got to the hospital the nurses got them checked in and after examining Ziva told them she was definitely going to have a baby that day. While Ziva got settled, Jethro stepped out and sent a brief text message: AT HOSPITAL NOW. He hoped his plan worked. Less than ten minutes later Jethro received a response: IN PLACE.

As the hours passed Ziva's labor became more intense and things moved along nicely. Ziva hadn't cursed Jethro even once and had, so far, not threatened to never let him near her again. He was encouraged. In the fourth hour things really began to move ahead and after several hard contractions close together the doctor was called.

Five hours and thirteen minutes after they checked into the hospital, Jethro cut the cord and the nurse handed him his newborn son. He felt as if his heart was going to explode with happiness. He looked at the wrinkled, reddish little boy and thought he was the most beautiful child he had ever seen. Right up there with Kelly. He turned and handed the baby to Ziva with tears of joy in his eyes.

"Here's our son, Zee. You did good."

"Oh my god, Jethro. A boy! He's so tiny."

Jethro leaned down and kissed her forehead, brushing her hair back and soaking in the sight of his wife and son. He had never in his life been happier. Quickly they counted his fingers and toes and found him to be all around perfect.

The nurse took the baby and they watched as she cleaned him up and weighed and measured him.

"You have a very healthy little boy here. Eight lbs, six ounces and nineteen inches long. Congratulations."

While Ziva was watching the nurse Jethro took his phone out and sent a one word text: COME.

The nurse handed the baby to Jethro while the doctor and nurses got Ziva cleaned up and settled. It had been an easy labor and delivery and she felt energized. Watching Jethro hold their son was the most magical thing Ziva had ever seen. She knew he would be a fantastic father. She sent up a prayer of thanks for her double blessing; a wonderful husband and a healthy baby.

When they were alone, Ziva asked, "Shouldn't you be making some phone calls?"

"Let's wait a while. I want to be alone for a few minutes before we tell people."

Not ten minutes later there was a soft knock at the door. Ziva assumed it was a nurse. Jethro handed the baby to her and went to open the door. He pulled it open and stepped aside knowing who was waiting on the other side.

Ziva was concentrating on the baby. She didn't look up until she sensed a presence near the bed.

Eli David stood there entranced by the sight of his only child holding his grandchild. A boy he assumed because of the blue blanket and cap.

"Father! How? When?"

She looked over at Jethro who stood at the end of the bed grinning.

"Jethro and I arranged it. It was his idea. You look beautiful Ziva. May I hold him?"

"Of course. I am so happy you are here, pappa. I did not think I could be happier than I was a few minutes ago but I am." She looked down at Jethro and said, "Thank you."

He moved to stand on the other side of the bed and bent down to kiss her. "You're welcome."

Eli cradled the baby in his left arm and looked at him closely. "He is beautiful. Perfect. What is his name?"

Ziva reached for his hand and said, "Elijah Jackson Gibbs."

The End


End file.
